


Friday Night Lights

by BatuuPrincess



Series: Damerey Week 2019 [5]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Canonical Character Death, Dementia, F/M, First Times, Fluff and Angst, Football, Mentions of Cancer, Reunions, flashbacks to high school
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-17
Updated: 2020-01-19
Packaged: 2020-12-20 19:55:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 27,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21062282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BatuuPrincess/pseuds/BatuuPrincess
Summary: “You know, I was texting Paige and she said Poe Dameron is finally back in town and he agreed to come tonight.”Rey’s heart stopped dead in her chest.“Poe Dameron?” she managed to squeak out, suddenly finding the air in the room a little thin.Rose finally emerged from the bathroom. “Don’t tell me you don’t remember Poe Dameron! He graduated with Paige when we were sophomores.”“Yeah, I remember Poe.”“You had the biggest crush on him. All freshman and sophomore years it was ‘Poe Dameron, this’ and ‘Poe Dameron, that.’” Rose nudged Rey with her shoulder. “Who knows, maybe you’ll actually work up the nerve to speak to him tonight.”Rey forced herself to laugh, going along with Rose’s good natured-teasing. It wasn’t her fault. There was no way she knew…Rey hadn't seen Poe Dameron for nearly 12 years, and with good reason. But all that was about to change as they headed to the annual Alumni Football game. It was only one night, and she probably wouldn't even run into him anyway. Plus she'd put all that nonsense with Poe behind her years ago. What could possibly happen over the course of one game?





	1. Pregame

**Author's Note:**

> Day 4! This one was a last minute swap that I'm still writing, but the idea was too good to pass up. Hope you enjoy!
> 
> Some notes: This is about the American kind of football because I'm American lol. Also, I know Sacred Heart of the Jedi is kind of lame, but I was aiming for an expensive-sounding private school.

Now

“Rooooose,” whined Rey, dropping down on her friend’s couch. “Do we have to?”

Rose poked her head out the bathroom door, mascara wand in one hand. “It’s tradition!”

“Well, it’s a stupid tradition.” Rey picked up the book on Rose’s perfectly instagrammable coffee table, flipping through pictures of other perfectly instagrammable houses. It made her sick, the grey and white aesthetic, a single throw pillow in teal or pink counting as a “ bold pop of color.” The only aesthetic Rey could claim these days was the “underpaid millennial,” a delightful mix of hand-me-down furniture and flea market knick-knacks that she never quite grew out of after college. Definitely not instagrammable. “I hate football. Can’t we just skip it? Go to the bar instead?”

“It’s the Alumni Game, Rey.”

“Yeah, and we’ve been out of school for 10 years. I think we can afford to miss one. And we just saw everyone at the reunion, anyway.”

“We do this every year.”

“Yes, and every year I beg you to not make me go, and every year you drag me along anyway.”

Rose stuck her head out into the hall again, eyebrows raised.

Rey sighed, dropping her head on the back of the couch. “And I take it this year is no different?”

“Bingo!” said Rose before disappearing back into the bathroom. “You know, I was texting Paige and she said Poe Dameron is finally back in town _ and _ he agreed to come tonight.”

Rey’s heart stopped dead in her chest.

“Poe Dameron?” she managed to squeak out, suddenly finding the air in the room a little thin.

Rose finally emerged from the bathroom, her hair and make up perfect (as usual), wearing the same class of ‘09 hoodie as Rey and somehow making it look good. “Don’t tell me you don’t remember Poe Dameron! He graduated with Paige when we were sophomores.” She plopped down next to Rey on the couch, straightening the books artfully stacked on the table.

“Yeah, I remember Poe.”

“You had the biggest crush on him. All freshman and sophomore years it was ‘Poe Dameron, this’ and ‘Poe Dameron, that.’” Rose nudged Rey with her shoulder. “Who knows, maybe you’ll actually work up the nerve to speak to him tonight.”

Rey forced herself to laugh, going along with Rose’s good natured-teasing. It wasn’t her fault. There was no way she knew…

Rey and Rose’s phones buzzed simultaneously.

“Finn’s running late. Gonna meet us there,” announced Rey, beating Rose to the group text. 

Rose tried to school her expression. Out of the blue, she’d decided that she had feelings for Finn after all these years, and as such, she’d been trying to catch his attention now for months. Finn was of course oblivious, going on about the women he met while Rose tried not to look hurt. 

From the beginning, Rey had told her that she was staying out of it. She could think of nothing more disastrous to their little trio than her two oldest friends getting together. But that was their problem. Rey apparently had bigger fish to fry tonight.

“We should head out if we’re going to stop and grab beer on the way.” Rose was already at the door, keys in hand. 

Poe Dameron. Now that was a name she hadn’t heard in a long time.

_ Then _

_ “Rey?” _

_ Rey looked up at the sound of her name, so engrossed in Macbeth she hadn’t heard anyone walk up. _

_ There stood Poe Dameron in all his shining glory. Student body president, captain of the baseball team, future homecoming king (probably), he was everything those old teen movies told her she should want in a boyfriend. Except tall. Though the rest of his roguish good looks made up for the lack of height - clear, tan skin, warm, brown eyes, and those jet black curls he kept styled just so across his forehead. _

_ And she was staring. Again. _

_ “That’s me,” she said, closing the book. Shakespeare could wait. _

_ He dropped his books on the table, sliding into the chair next to her. “Wait a sec, I know you. You’re Paige’s little sister’s friend.” _

_ Rey’s face heated. “Yeah, Rose and I are friends.” _

_ His answering smile was genuine. And a little blinding. “Excellent, so you’re my tutor? I was expecting someone…” _

_ “Older?” she supplied. As a sophomore taking mostly senior classes, she got that a lot. _

_ “Yeah, something like that,” he mumbled, not quite making eye contact. He opened his physics book. “Ok, so where do we start?” _

_ She couldn’t believe her luck. Whatever she’d been expecting when Mr. Pizon asked her to tutor a senior in physics, Poe Dameron certainly wasn’t it. It left her a little more flustered than she cared to admit. _

_ “Um, yeah,” she started, digging her own copy of the physics text out of her backpack. She needed to get it together and fast. “Let’s start with where you are. What’s your current grade?” _

_ “B.” _

_ Rey blinked at him. “You have a B? So, why do you need a tutor again?” _

_ Poe sighed like he’d had this conversation on more than one occasion and it got a little more tiring each time. “I want to be a pilot, so I need a pretty good working knowledge of physics. And I’m struggling. That B is hard won. For some reason, it’s just not sticking.” Absently, he ran a hand through his curls. “Can you help me?” _

_ She wanted to say no. Badly. Her own classes were kicking her ass and midterms were coming up and she was a decent tutor, but how do you help someone who's already getting a B? _

_ Then he turned to her, looking a little lost, those big, brown eyes imploring her to help him. It was no use, she was helpless against that silent plea. _

_ “I can try.” _

_ Despite her tempering words, another smile spread across his face, Rey unable to stop the answering smile on her own. _

  


Now

“Rey?”

Rey blinked in the bright lights of the beer cave, trying to remember what she was supposed to be doing. Oh, that’s right. She needed to pick something to sneak into the game. 

Forties lined the shelves behind the glass, each beckoning her to choose. A flash of green and yellow caught her eye, Rey reaching for the giant can of Smirnoff Ice. That would do.

“Is that what you’re getting?” asked Rose, a forty of Coors in one hand and a Colt 45 in the other. “Old school, I like it. Oh my god, do you think we should ice Finn?”

Rey laughed, the sound chasing away the earlier memories of Poe. “I mean, technically, that was more of a college thing, but hell yes. We should definitely ice Finn.”

Rose quickly replaced the forties with the Smirnoffs and they were back in the car in no time, headed up the hill to good old Sacred Heart of the Jedi.

Rey’s stomach gave a flip. They did this every year, and still she got the same nervous dread she’d felt every day of her high school career as the school came into view. It didn’t matter how many years had passed or how (relatively) successful she became, she’d still be that same nerdy freshman every time she stepped foot on campus.

Rose deftly avoided the cop parked in the lot to discourage exactly what they were about to do, pulling in to a spot under the trees and turning off the ignition.

“Why do you have that look on your face?” she asked, leaning over to grab the bag of Smirnoffs at Rey’s feet.

Rey decided to play dumb. “What look?”

“That look of terror like we’re about to get caught doing something we’re not supposed to.”

“I mean, there is a cop.”

“We’re almost 30, and the car isn’t going anywhere. I don’t even think this is illegal.”

Rey wasn’t so sure about that, but the ins and outs of open container laws weren’t exactly her specialty. “Whatever you say. Are we doing this or not?” A slight buzz would make this whole night a little more palatable. 

Rose handed her a can. Rey was just about to pop the tab when a sharp tap at the window had her jumping out of her skin. 

Despite Rose’s earlier insistence, they both automatically hid the cans, only to find Finn at the passenger window.

Rose hit the locks as Rey lowered the window.

“It took me forever to find you two. Are neither of you answering your texts?”

Rey looked down and sure enough she had six missed messages from Finn. “Apparently not. Hop in.”

“We’ve got a present for you in the bag,” added Rose.

Finn clamored into the back, the paper bag from the gas station rustling until:

“Oh, come on! You’ve got to be kidding me. This thing is huge!”

Rey laughed, completely at ease for the first time that night. “You know the rules, bro. But since it’s double the size, we’ll give you double the time.”

Finn was still looking at them in disbelief. “But I can’t even properly kneel back here.”

Rose looked at her for confirmation. “We’ll allow it. Point it to the sky and chug!”

With a heavy sigh, Finn did just that, popping it open before chugging half in one go. 

“Ugh,” he said, swallowing thickly. 

“You better not barf in my car! It’s new!”

“Well maybe you should have thought of that before icing me!”

Rey rolled her eyes at what passed for banter between the two. She was pretty sure Finn had been trying to flirt with Rose for like the last three years, but both were too dense to recognize it. She took a sip of her drink. Maybe tonight wouldn’t be so bad after all.

_ Then _

_ Rey attempted to sneak through the crowds of her classmates unnoticed. Who thought this was a good idea anyway? _

_ Rose’s parents were out of town for the weekend, and Paige had the bright idea to throw a party. It was too perfect, what with the way it coincided with the start of Christmas break and all. Somehow Rey had gotten roped into it, agreeing to keep Rose company and then promptly getting dropped when Iolo started to flirt with her. Even now, she could hear Rose’s over-top-laugh at something Iolo had said. Rey tried not to roll her eyes, sidestepping the captain of the football team as he got iced by his defensive line. If only she could make to the door without getting stopped… _

_ “Hey Sunshine!” _

_ Rey froze at the nickname and the familiar voice of the only person who used it. _

_ He looked amazing as always, albeit a little drunk right now, if the shiny eyes and sweaty forehead were anything to go off. Though those jet black curls were still perfectly arranged. Absently, she wondered how long he spent on them each morning. _

_ Poe was a little out of breath when he finally reached her. “Hey Sunshine, I thought that was you.” _

_ “Yeah, it’s me,” she answered lamely, trying to look anywhere but at those plush lips, parted slightly in greeting. His tongue darted out, leaving them shiny in its wake. _

Not helping, Rey_, she pointed out to herself. _

_ She needed to change tack. “How did the final go?” _

_ Poe smiled wide, a little more loose and open than his usual look. “Got an A. I bugged Mr. Pizon until he graded it for me.” _

_ She’d been tutoring him for months now, twice a week after school, something she’d failed to mention to any of her friends, Rose included. Actually, Rose especially. She would never hear the end of it if Rose got wind she was tutoring Poe Dameron, the boy she’d had a never ending crush on freshman year. _

_ Plus, there was no way Poe wanted it to get out, she was sure of it. So, the tutoring (and the strange blossoming friendship that accompanied it) was their little secret. _

_ She gave a cursory glance around the party to make sure no one was watching before pulling him into the briefest of hugs. _

_ “That’s amazing, Poe. See, you don’t even need me anymore.” _

_ He looked a little more alarmed at that prospect than she’d been expecting. “I’m not sure I’d say that. Still have a whole other semester to go.” Quickly rearranging his face into a smile, he shifted nervously on his feet. “Anyway, I have a little thank you for all your help.” _

_ Rey was touched, completely at a loss for words, until he pulled a familiar-looking bottle out of his back pocket. _

_ “You’re icing me? After I got you an A?” She accepted the bottle, twisting the cap. “And it’s warm. Gross.” With a sigh, she got down on one knee, stopping just shy of bringing the bottle to her lips. “You know, you can get in a lot of trouble for providing alcohol to a minor.” _

_ “I’m only 17, and you know that. Now, quit stalling and chug.” _

_ She did know that, in fact, they’d just talked about it yesterday. How they were only a year apart despite the two grade difference. _

_ “Fine, fine. If you insist.” She tipped her head back, wincing as the familiar sweetness hit her tongue. _

_ Poe was still grinning at her when she downed the last, bringing the bottle from her lips with an exaggerated pop. _

_ “I’m not going to pretend like I’m not impressed,” he said, helping her to her feet. _

_ “What, did you think you were the first person to ice me?” _

Now

Finn finished the can with a groan. “Ok, I definitely do not miss this part of college.”

“Honestly, I’m a little impressed you can still do that at your age.” Rey smirked at him, Rose stifling a laugh next to her.

“Excuse you, you’re the same age.”

“I meant it as a compliment. I’m only halfway through mine.” Rey laughed, taking another sip of her drink. 

“Come on, Rey. Dump that in a water bottle or something.” Finn belched. “We’re gonna miss kick off.”

“I’m pretty sure we already did,” said Rose, ever helpful. She handed Rey an empty water bottle. “Here. You want another one, Finn?”

“Not particularly.” 

Rose laughed, stuffing an extra can in her purse anyway before opening the door. The cheers from the game echoed through the parking lot. 

“Ready?” Rose asked nobody in particular.

“As I’ll ever be.” Rey’s hand lingered on the door handle.

With a final deep breath, she released the door and stepped into the fall night.


	2. First Quarter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey runs into some familiar faces at the game, bringing some old memories to light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2! Let's dive a little deeper into that backstory, shall we?

Now

Sacred Heart was exactly as she remembered it.

As they walked through the gates, she couldn’t help but pick out all the familiar faces. There was Snap and Kare and their three kids by the concession stand. And over by the stands, Jess and Kaydel were deep in conversation with some of the marching band alumni. Iolo gestured wildly as he spoke to their old U.S. Government teacher near the fence. 

She’d see them all before long. It was the same every year. The first quarter was for mingling and then everyone would slowly migrate until the whole group was stationed at the fence just in time for the halftime show.

Rose was off as soon as they entered the stadium, shouting after someone she claimed was in her homeroom all four years and leaving Finn and Rey to their own devices.

“Never gets old, does it?” said Finn as they watched her go. Always the most social of their little gang, Rose flitted from group to group, barely pausing long enough to say hi to one before she was off to the next.

“Not for her. You know, I’m not sure why she drags us along every year. It’s not like she’d have any trouble finding someone to hang out with.”

Finn slung an arm around her shoulders. “I think it’s because we’re her best friends and she wants to spend time with us.”

Rey raised her eyebrows at him, but didn’t comment, instead letting him guide her toward the stands. 

As they made their way through the stands, she turned to wave every time she heard her name called, which was honestly a lot more than she was expecting. There was a girl from her geography class junior year and the couple she always hung out with in 6th period gym, not to mention those cheerleaders she tutored through geometry and pre-calc. They couldn’t seem to move five feet without someone stopping to say hello.

“You know, if I didn’t know any better, I’d almost say you were more popular than Rose,” teased Finn as they were waylaid by yet another man who insisted that Rey was the only reason he made it through sophomore year English.

She brushed him off. “Whatever, the only reason people knew me is because I was such a nerd. Tutoring doesn’t count.”

“Listen, I’m not gonna fight you on this - mainly because I know I won’t win - but at least three people just came up to you and said they knew you from gym. Now, I’ve known you a long time, so I can say with some confidence that there is no way you tutored people in gym.”

Rey swatted him, laughing even as she called him an ass. “Just because I’m not all that athletic-”

“That’s the understatement of the century.”

She was about to swat him again, but the sound of her name saved him.

“Rey!”

She turned in the direction of the voice, her heart stopping dead in her chest.

Poe Dameron stood 10 feet away, his hand raised in greeting. By some magic, Poe at nearly thirty looked even better than Poe at 17, though all the fundamentals were the same. Same dark, curly hair arranged just so across his forehead, same slightly crooked smile, same dark, deep set eyes. Though the way those eyes crinkled when he smiled at her was definitely new, tiny lines fanning out from the corners in the most endearing way possible.

He started towards them.

“Oh, shit,” whispered Finn under his breath.

Rey finally remembered to breathe, taking a shaky gulp of air. She was pleased to note that her voice was even when she said to Finn, “No big deal, I tutored him, too.”

Finn gave her A Look. “Remember who you’re speaking to. You and I both know you did a whole hell of a lot more than just tutor that boy.”

_Then_

_ It had been a shitty day. _

_She’d gotten a B+ on her calculus test. Which made her snap at Rose during lunch. And now Rose wasn’t speaking to her. And Finn wasn’t speaking to her in solidarity with Rose (it was a really shitty comment, ok?). So by the time she made it to the library after school for a tutoring session Poe most definitely didn’t need any more, she was more than ready for this day to be over. _

_ “So I say to Snap-” He paused, noticing for the first time that Rey’s attention was elsewhere. “Earth to Rey? Are you listening?” _

_ The answer to that question was no, she was actually reliving the look on Rose’s face when Rey told her that of course she didn’t get the big deal, a B+ was actually good for _her…

_ Yeah, she definitely deserved the silent treatment. _

_ “I don’t know Poe, are you actually going to work on your physics homework or are you wasting both of our time?” She slammed her text shut, shoving it into her backpack and turning so Poe couldn’t see the tears welling in her eyes. _

_ He grabbed her forearm before she could get away. “Whoa, whoa, whoa, what’s going on? This isn’t really about physics, is it?” _

_ She jerked her arm out of his grasp. _

_ “I’m having a really shitty day and it’s bad enough that I bombed a calculus test and my friends aren’t speaking to me, but now I missed my bus for tutoring we both know you don’t need. You’re just wasting my time.” With that, she grabbed her bag and turned to go. _

_ “Wait, where are you going?” _

_ If she was a smarter girl, she would have ignored him, but even all these months later the sound of his voice was enough to stop her in her tracks. _

_ “To catch the bus.” _

_ His forehead crinkled. “But you just said you missed the bus.” _

_ “The city bus, Poe. When I miss the school bus, I have to take the city bus. Not all of us have cars, you know.” It killed her just a little to admit that, especially to him. _

_ “Can’t your mom come pick you up or something?” _

_ “Sorry, fresh out of those, too,” she snapped, a little mortified to realize that she was crying in earnest now, fat tears rolling down both cheeks at an alarming rate. _

_ He blinked at her, obviously trying to digest that information. “Jesus, Rey, I’m sorry. I had no clue.” Closing the gap between them, he pulled her into a crushing hug, backpack and all. Never quite sure what to do with that much affection, she stiffened for a second before melting into the embrace. “Let me drive you home. Please.” _

_ The look on his face when she finally pulled back showed genuine remorse. He felt bad. He wanted to make it up to her. _

_ Against her better judgment she answered, “Ok,” swiping the back of her hand across her cheeks. _

_ Poe jumped to action, packing his books, pushing in chairs, guiding them out of the library, all the while keeping up a chipper one-sided conversation as Rey sniffed in the background. _

_ “You know, my physics grade is improving, but I could always use the extra help. That is, if you’re willing to give it. I totally understand if you’re not. But I’m really not confident about that unit on springs. Like, why change the equations on me now? Maybe when we work together, I can just take you home after. I have a car, so I really don’t mind…” _

_ He babbled all the way through the school, out onto the grounds, and to the car, not stopping even as they got in and he hit the ignition. _

_ Rey sunk in to the buttery leather seats of his brand new truck. Or at least she assumed that it was brand new. It certainly smelled like it. _

_ Now that the anger and tears had passed, the shame started to make itself comfortable in her chest, settling in for the long haul. What the hell had she been thinking? She barely talked about this stuff with Rose, let alone Poe motherfucking Dameron. Yet she found herself wanting to explain. To tell him why she broke down. Why god why had she let herself cry in front of him? And how was he _ still _ talking? _

_ “I’m on scholarship here.” Poe cut off as soon as she spoke, leaving only the sound of the radio and Rey’s soft words. “I mean, obviously.” She smiled, gesturing to her ratty old backpack and scuffed shoes. Taking a deep breath, she went on. “And I got a B+ on a calculus test today-” _

_ “Rey, there’s no way they’d kick-” _

_ She raised a hand. “Poe.” He shut his mouth immediately, plunging the car back into silence. Rey relished the quiet for a second before going on. “Let me finish.” He gulped audibly, giving her a nod to keep going. “Logically, I know they won’t take away the scholarship for a B+, but I couldn’t stop thinking about how I took my eyes off the prize for one second and this happened, and how easy it would be to let it slide further.” Rey looked down at her lap. “Nobody gets how much harder I have to work for the same advantages. And I’m tired. Tired of having to try so hard for things the rest of you just automatically expect. Tired of needing perfect grades if I want any hope of going to college. Tired of being different. Just, tired. _

_ “So I snapped and I said something terrible to Rose and Finn took her side and I totally deserved it, but that’s why I lost it in the library. And took it out on you.” _

_ Silence met her when she finally took a breath, stretching as one song ended and another began. Her face heated. Apparently, Poe’s diarrhea of the mouth was contagious. _

_ She was just about to try to backpedal when Poe broke the silence. _

_ “You’re right, I don’t understand. I’m really lucky and I do know that, it’s just, sometimes I forget. Which I guess is luxury in and of itself. And it wasn’t fair for me to take advantage of your willingness to help me and waste your time like that. So, I’m sorry. And if you want to stop, I totally understand.” _

_ Rey finally got the courage to look up from her folded hands. Poe’s dark eyes met hers in the late afternoon gloom, a few snowflakes starting to fall on the other side of the windshield. It was frigid out there, but with the car running and the heated seats (because of course he had heated seats), Rey had never been warmer. At least, she told herself it was the car’s fault and not the company, though the way he was looking at her certainly wasn’t helping. _

_ He may not have understood exactly what she was going through, but there was a look about him, something a little tight in his eyes and mouth, that told her he was going through something all his own. _

_ Maybe that was why when she finally opened her mouth, she surprised them both when she said, “I don’t want to stop.” _

_ The hope in his expression threatened to take her breath away. “You don’t?” _

_ As much as she knew she should say no, quit wasting her time, focus on her own studies, she couldn’t make herself take that look off his face. “No. I don’t.” _

Now

Poe smiled from ear to ear as he approached.

“Finn! Man, it’s been forever.” They did that bro thing with clasping hands and smacking backs. 

Finn said something noncommittal back, but Poe had already turned to her.

“And Rey.” He didn’t give her any time to react, pulling her into a bone crunching hug. “It’s so good to see you. It’s been, what? Eleven years?”

“Twelve,” she answered, pulling back to get a better look at him. How was he actually getting better with age? “But who’s counting?”

Finn’s eyes were wide next to her. “Well, I’m gonna go find Rose and let you two catch up. I’ll see you guys at the fence.”

He was gone before Rey could protest, swallowed by the crowd. Traitor.

Poe’s face screwed up in confusion. “The fence?” 

She could feel her neck pulse with each beat of her heart. It was an easy question, and safe territory. She could do this.

Slapping on what she hoped was an easygoing smile, she said, “Oh yeah, this is your first year back, isn’t it? I don’t know what it is, but every year we spend the first half spread out across the stadium, and slowly work our way over to the fence at the edge of the stands. By the time the marching band takes the field, we’re all there.”

“Man, I guess I’m out of the loop.” He shook off the thought. “But anyway, how are you? It’s been forever.”

“Good, good,” she said answered, as vague as possible. There was no need for them to get deep. They hadn’t been friends in a long time. “How about you?” 

“Can’t complain.” He flashed the smile that won him every student body election. “Still doing what I love, thanks to you.”

That definitely piqued her interest. “You actually became a pilot?”

“Yeah, of course. Going on eight years now. I mean, you became an engineer just like you wanted to in high school, right?”

“Wait, how do you know I’m an engineer?” It wasn’t Facebook. She’d looked long and hard for any hint of Poe Dameron and found nothing. He was either incredibly private or not on the site at all, but she was betting on the latter.

He looked at her like she had three heads. “Paige told me. We still catch up from time to time.”

Paige told him? But that would mean… “You ask about me?”

“Yeah. Don’t you ask her about me?”

The blank look on her face must have given away the answer.

And to be honest, it hadn’t even crossed her mind. Poe was a part of her past, and a complicated one at that. As such, she wanted nothing more than to put him in her rear-view mirror. Too bad he hadn’t stayed there.

“Ohhhh,” he said, mouth turning up in a wry grin. “I guess that’s what I get for assuming.”

Rey opened her mouth to say something - either to apologize or explain - when a whistle blew. The first quarter was over.

“I should go find Finn and Rose and grab some food before halftime,” she said, trying not to notice the way his face fell. “But it was good to see you.” A quick but awkward hug and then she was making her way toward the steps.

“I’ll see you at the fence, right?”

He looked so hopeful under the lights that she couldn’t help but lie. “Of course.” 

There was no reason he needed to know she’d be avoiding him like the plague.

She was down the steps before she changed her mind, let herself fall into those warm, brown eyes like she used to. So with her mind on brown eyes and cold nights, she didn’t notice the hands until they pulled her under the bleachers.

There was a moment of panic before she recognized her attacker. “Rose? What the hell?”


	3. Second Quarter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Rose exchange words when Rey's former relationship with Poe comes to light. A slice of pizza brings back memories of the past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we're diving a little deeper into Rey's backstory here. The past gets fairly angsty from here on out, but I promise a happy ending in the present.
> 
> Nothing too terrible to warn about, just some mentions of dementia-like symptoms and Rey's less than stellar home life.

Now

Rose stared at her like it was the most natural thing in the world to drag your best friend under the bleachers. “Did I just see you hugging Poe Dameron? Since when are you two friends?”

Rey tried not to cringe. Of course Rose caught every minute of that. She shouldn’t be surprised. 

She was about to launch into an explanation when Paige, half hidden in the shadows, beat her to the punch. “Wait, didn’t you two used to date?”

Well, that definitely wasn’t the explanation she was going for.

Rose gaped at her, mouth hanging open. 

“I meanー I wouldn’t necessarilyー” Rey stumbled over her words. 

Paige took a long drag on her cigarette. God, this took her back. What was it about being on school grounds that instantly reverted you back to 16? Besides their little group, there were at least two couples (both grown ass adults) necking under here like a bunch of teenagers. 

Paige exhaled in a single stream, the white smoke disappearing into the dark underside of the bleachers. “No, I definitely remember you two being together toward the end of senior year. You guys were damn near inseparable.” 

Rose’s eyes had tightened, her shock solidifying into something that looked a lot like betrayal.

Rey took a deep breath. “Listen, I can explain.”

_ Then _

_ She hadn’t meant for it to be a secret. _

_ And in her defense, there hadn’t been anything to keep secret at first. She tutored Poe in physics. The only reason Rose didn’t know is because they weren’t speaking. _

_ It had been the longest fight they’d ever been in, starting the day she snapped at Rose about her grades and not ending until nearly a month later. Finn, being Finn, had forgiven her quickly, but was adamant about staying out of what he referred to as “girl shit.” So, by the time they started talking again and there actually was something to tell Rose, Rey had no clue how to broach the subject. _

_ Oh, she tried. More than once. But every time she stopped short. And the one time she finally got the words out, Rose dismissed her out of hand. _

_ Which was why she now spent most of her time lying to Rose. Well, she actually didn’t spend as much time lying to her as she thought she would, not with Rose so wrapped up in Iolo these days.  _

_ It had started innocently enough with that first ride home. They had joked and laughed as Rey gave careful directions to the house she and her grandfather lived in, Rey knocking him for his ridiculous taste in music.  _

_ “Shouldn’t you be paying attention to the road?” she asked, watching as he dug through a stack of burned CDs. _

_ “Listen, at least 90% of driving is finding the right music.”  _

_ Not that she knew all that much about driving - no access to a car and all that - but she was pretty sure that wasn’t the case. _

_ He glanced up at the road before digging back into the glovebox. “There it is.” _

_ He added the disc to the player with a little flourish, both of them waiting with baited breath in the silence before the CD played. _

_ A little melancholy, heavy on the strings and bells, the song that came through the speakers was definitely not what she was expecting. _

_ “What is this?” she asked as someone sung about Chicago. All things go, all things go.  _

_ He turned up the volume. “Sufjan Stevens.” _

_ Rey was quiet for a minute, thoughtful as she listened. A slow smile spread across her face. _

_ Poe turned and asked, “What?” _

_ “You are not what I was expecting, Poe Dameron.” _

_ “I contain multitudes.” He laughed. “And for the record, you weren’t what I was expecting either, Rey Kenobi.” _

_ Next thing she knew, he was driving her home daily. They’d given up the guise of tutoring almost immediately, instead spending their time together working on their own studies. Something had changed along the way, and each day that passed without her telling Rose made it a little more secret. _

Now

“And you kept it from me all these years?” Rose sounded more hurt than Rey had expected.

Paige stubbed out the cigarette. “Rey is too nice to say this to your face, so I’ll say it for her. And I’m telling you this with the utmost amount of love and respect, but you could be a self-absorbed little shit in high school. Especially when you were dating someone.”

Rose rolled her eyes. “Gee, thanks Paige. And I know that. It’s just,” she paused, turning back toward Rey, “It’s been 12 years. How could you not tell me in 12 years?”

“By the time I was ready to talk about it, it was already old news.” Rey shrugged. “It didn’t seem so important anymore.”

Paige scoffed right as Finn walked up.

“What didn’t seem so important anymore? And why are we having this conversation under the bleachers?” He shot a pointed look at one of the couples, who by the looks of it, had just rounded another base. Gross.

Rose ignored his questions. “Did you know she was dating Poe Dameron sophomore year?”

Finn got the panicky look of a man cornered. “Uhh…” He looked to Rey for confirmation.

“It’s fine, Finn. She knows.”

Rose looked at them in outrage. “Am I the only person who didn’t know?”

Finn, Paige, and Rey answered as one, “Yes.”

Rose took a deep breath - in through the nose, out through the mouth - and turned to Rey. “Ok, start at the beginning.”

Rey shuffled her feet slightly in the gravel, listening to the stones tinkling together. “Well, it started out with me tutoring him in physics-”

“You already said that, get to the part where you’re dating Poe Dameron.” Rose cut in. 

Rey felt her temper flare to life. It was just like Rose to interrupt, to somehow make Rey’s past about her. This was she hadn’t wanted to come tonight. No matter how hard she worked or how much she changed, every time she stepped foot on these grounds, she’d once again be the sixteen year old version of herself.

“Yes, I dated Poe Dameron. No, I did not get your express written consent to do so. Contrary to popular belief, I did have a life that wasn’t centered around you. Now, I’m sorry that your feeling are hurt, but for fuck’s sake Rose, it was 12 years ago. Get over it!”

On that note, Rey turned on her heel and stomped away from the incredulous looks on her friend’s faces.

She wasn’t even sure where she was going until she was standing in front of the concession stand, hot tears pricking at the corners of her eyes. 

“Gino’s Pizza, now that’s a blast from the past.”

Of fucking course Poe Dameron chose that moment to sidle up to her in line. He kept his eyes forward, facing the menu board tacked to the side of the wooden booth. She a deep but shaky breath.

“I haven’t had a slice in, god, it must be 10 years,” he went on, his gaze soft with nostalgia. One hand came up to run through his hair. Rey watched the motion with a little too much fascination. “Is it still as good as I remember?”

Rey swallowed. “Don’t know. I haven’t had it since high school, either.”

Poe turned to her, a look of mock horror on his face. “What? We must rectify this immediately.” He stepped forward, the next in line.

“Two slices of Gino’s finest, please.” He turned back to her. “Cheese or pepperoni?”

“You don’t have to-”

“Not an answer. Cheese or pepperoni?”

Rey cracked a smile in spite of herself. “Pepperoni.”

“Atta girl. Two pepperonis.”

She listened as he charmed the pants off the band moms running the booth, smiling and teasing and god, he hadn’t changed at all, had he? Same charming, smug bastard with a heart of gold. 

There was no doubt in her mind that he had heard whatever went down under the bleachers just now. He was acting too innocent, being too nice to her for it to be a coincidence. Same old Poe.

Transaction completed - and both women eating out of his hand - Poe handed her a piping hot slice of pepperoni, cheese dripping off the edge of the paper plate. They walked over to the side of the booth, Poe watching expectantly as she took her first bite. 

“So?”

The cheese practically melted in her mouth and the pepperoni hit just the right balance of greasy and spicy and the sauce was exactly as she remembered. It was like a shot of pure nostalgia. 

Rey smiled. “It tastes like 2007.”

_ Then _

_ It was already starting to get dark when they finally left the school building, the iron grey skies screaming of snow. Rey hated this time of year if for no other reason than the lack of sunlight (though trudging through feet of snow in a skirt and tights was pretty high on the list). _

_ They’d lost track of time, the librarian finally kicking them out of the otherwise empty library at five. Not that Rey minded. Her homework was done and she’d take any extra time with Poe that she could get these days. _

_ It wasn’t exactly dating, whatever they were doing, but it was close enough that she’d started to feel territorial, always happy to further cement her place in his orbit.  _

_ By now, she was used to the buttery leather of his truck and his strange taste in music, so she simply settled in for the ride, cranking the heated seats to full blast. He didn’t need directions anymore, smoothly taking turns and winding his way through the streets by memory alone. _

_ Her street looked nicer than usual under the blanket of snow, still so fresh that the plows hadn’t come yet. Granted, the plows tended to take a while. This part of town wasn’t exactly a high priority. _

_ She was laughing at something Poe said as he turned into her driveway, Rey looking up only to have her heart plummet to the floor. _

_ Wandering through the fresh snow in nothing but his bathrobe and a pair of boots was none other than her grandfather, Ben Kenobi. As if in a trance, Rey opened the door to the still moving car, ignoring Poe’s shouts as he brought it to a stop. Out and through the snow she went, ignoring the way the cold and wet seeped in at her ankles. _

_ “Grandad? What are you doing out here?” Her heart pounded in her chest, praying to every god she knew that this wasn’t one of his episodes. _

_ “Satine? Is that you?” _

_ Naturally, those prayers fell on deaf ears. _

_ “No, Grandad, it’s me, Rey.” She reached for his arm, hoping against hope that he’d go quietly into the house. “Come on, let’s get you inside. It’s freezing out here.” _

_ “Unhand me!” Her grandfather wrenched violently out of her grip, Rey instantly losing her balance and falling into the three inches of snow in the driveway. “I’m looking for Satine.” _

_ Poe was at her side at an instant. “Rey? Are you okay?” He tried to help her up, humiliation making her jerk out of his reach.  _

_ “I can get up on my own just fine,” she gritted out, lifting herself from the snow. _

_ Poe turned his attention to her grandfather, still pacing and muttering in the drive. “Mr. Kenobi? My name’s Poe. I’m a friend of Satine’s. Let’s go check for her in the house.” _

_ Grandad blinked at him, suddenly nodding his head. “Yes, yes, in the house.” _

_ By some miracle, he let Poe take his arm, guiding him up the front steps and in to the open door, while Rey trudged behind. Of course, the house was a disaster. Rey tried her best to keep up with it along with the shopping and her school work and shoveling the driveway and paying the bills, but sometimes it slipped. Unfortunately this happened to be one of those times. _

_ She sincerely hoped Poe wouldn’t notice the dishes piled in the sink from last night’s dinner or the trash she forgot to take out that morning, not to mention the piles of newspapers Grandad insisted she keep neatly stacked on the dining room table. _

_ She watched in silence as Poe coaxed the old man into his favorite chair, her grandfather happily settling in and turning on the TV like nothing had just happened. _

_ Rey’s cheeks burned in the sudden warmth of the house. She was so close to tears her head was already pounding in anticipation. _

_ Once he was sure her grandfather wasn’t going anywhere, Poe turned to Rey. _

_ “Why is your grandfather calling you Satine?” _

_ She felt her face heat further, scrambling to think of something, anything, to tell him, finally settling on the truth. “It was my grandmother’s name. She died before I was born. Sometimes Grandad gets confused.” _

_ “How long has this been going on?” Poe had that look on his face, like he was gearing up to do what was right, tell a trusted adult, get the right people involved.  _

_ Her heart raced in her chest, blind panic setting in. Rey grabbed his hands, prepared to beg if she needed to. “I don’t know, a year? Maybe two? Poe, you can’t tell anyone, I’m begging you. There’s no one else, and I’ve got barely a year and a half until I’m 18…” _

_ Poe gave her a concerned look. “Is there anybody who helps you? He seems like a lot to handle.” _

_ “Verna down the street works nights at the hospital, so she looks in on him while I’m at school.” She neglected to mention that Verna had told her in no uncertain terms last week that Grandad was getting worse. More episodes, less lucidity, the works. “We’ve got it under control." _

_ “Rey, are you sure? I bet we could-” _

_ “No.” She cut him off flat. “This is my only option. I’m not letting them hall him off to some institution. We’re all each other has in this world, and I am not spending the next year and a half in some group home, I won’t do it.” _

_ Poe nodded, looking a whole hell of a lot like she felt: completely in over his head. Something settled over his face, a resolve that hadn’t been there a minute ago. “Ok, you got any food around here? I don’t think he was out there long, but we should get your grandfather something warm to eat.” _

_ Rey’s face fell. Grandad’s check got deposited today, so it was grocery day, only she’d skipped it to study with Poe.  _

_ Poe saw something on her face - probably the trembling lip or the look of absolute horror - and changed direction. “Gino’s it is.” He got his wallet out of his back pocket. “You guys cheese or pepperoni people?” _

Now

She stared as Poe took his own first bite with a little too much interest, watching those plush lips close around the cheese, trying not to blush at the obscene moan when it finally hit his tongue.

“This is exactly like I remember it,” he said when he’d finally swallowed that first bite. Rey quickly busied herself with the rest of her slice. “Maybe even better.”

Somewhere on the field, a whistle blew. It was the end of the first half.

“Shit, don’t we need to be at some fence for the band?” He looked down the field, always wanting to do the right thing, even if it was just some stupid tradition.

Rey shook her head. Some things never change. 

She took a deep breath, steeling herself for whatever was waiting for her with her friends. It wasn’t like she could avoid Rose forever. Better to get it over with now. She was Rey’s ride home, after all.

She took the final bite of her pizza and tossed the empty plate. “Yeah, follow me.”


	4. Halftime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the present, the crew watches the marching bands take the field. In the past, Rey meets the parents courtesy of a sneak attack by Poe and learns a little more about his home life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so this is where the angst gets real. Shara is in this and she's sick. It's not mentioned outright in this chapter, but it's heavily hinted that she has cancer.
> 
> Also, the chapter count went up on this because I have zero self control. Enjoy!

Now

Poe trailed a step behind her as they started the long process of getting to the other side of the stadium. The crowds were obscene, everyone trying to get to the bathroom or grab a snack during halftime and it certainly didn’t help that they were going against the stream. After a second, he fought his way next to her.

“This is intense,” he said, raising his voice to be heard above the crowd. “Is it always like this?”

Rey shrugged. “Not sure, I’m normally already over there.”

They pressed themselves against the fence, waiting for a torrent of people to come off the stands. The visitor’s band was already on the field, playing a janky rendition of a Bruno Mars song.

“Hey, uh, full disclosure, I kind of overheard your conversation with Rose earlier.” Between the band and the people, he was practically shouting now. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to cause an issue between you two.”

Well, she’d already suspected as much, but this was certainly not where she would have chosen to have this particular conversation, what with the need to shout their business and the presence of a few thousand of their closest friends. Yet, this was happening.

“It’s not your fault, not really. I should have told her ages ago.”

“Still.” He paused, letting another group go past before he spoke again. “Why didn’t you tell her?”

Well, this day was certainly not going how she wanted. Was everybody dead set on making her expose her soul today?

They were moving again, the rest of the crew in view, when she finally answered. “Rose and I weren’t really speaking when we...“ she trailed off for a second, hoping Poe got the gist. “By the time we started talking again, it already felt too late to tell her. So I just didn’t.” Rey shrugged, adding in a soft voice, “And she wouldn’t have believed me anyway.”

_ Then _

_ “Rose,” Rey said, waiting for her left hand to dry. Painting their nails had been Rose’s idea, and while Rey didn’t see much point in it, much less the obnoxious shade of fuchsia that had been chosen for her, she needed Rose happy and with her guard down. _

_ Rey was going to tell her. _

_ It had been nearly a month since the start of their fight, but they were finally talking again, and Rey was going to do it. _

_ After everything with her grandfather, she and Poe had grown closer, so much so that this, whatever it was they were doing, had started to feel inevitable. And that meant it was time to tell Rose. _

_ She pretended not to notice how her hands shook slightly, nailpolish smearing on the edge of her skin. _

_ Rose looked up from her own emerald shade. _

_ Rey took a deep breath, deciding to just go for it. “I want to talk to you about Poe...” _

_ Rose groaned. “Rey, come on. You’ve been talking about him since freshman year.” _

_ Well, this was certainly not ideal. But Rey was determined to push on. “I know, but-"_

_"Please do not start going on about your crush on Poe again. I mean, it was cute freshman year, but we’re sophomores now.” She put a hand over Rey’s, adopting a condescending tone. “I’m saying this for your own good, but this is getting a little embarrassing. You need to get over him, find a real, mature relationship like what Iolo and I have.” She gave a wistful sigh. _ _“Oh, Rey, I hope that you are as happy as we are one day.” Rose’s voice had taken on that breathy quality she got whenever Iolo came up. Which was quite frankly, a lot. “We’ve overcome so much adversity, but I couldn’t be more thankful for it. Our relationship is the strongest it’s ever been.”_

_ Rey tried not to roll her eyes. From what she could tell, all that Iolo and Rose had were three classes together and a penchant for PDA when in large groups and the only thing they’d overcome had been three breakups over ridiculous shit in the past month alone. It wasn’t exactly the romance of the ages. Rose, with her stable home and uncomplicated boyfriend, wouldn’t know adversity if it bit her in the ass. _

_ But honestly, that was one of the things that drew her to Rose in the first place. Rey had enough complicated in her life, she needed a best friend who was decidedly not. And she did love the girl, even if she was a little obtuse at times. _

_ So she shut her mouth and let Rose prattle on about Iolo and the latest issue of Cosmo and whatever the hell was happening to Britney Spears. _

_ If that conversation with Rose taught her anything, it was that no one would believe that Poe Dameron, darling of The Sacred Heart of the Jedi and most popular boy in school, would have anything to do with a no-name sophomore from the wrong side of the tracks. And maybe it was better that way. _

Now

They reached the main group right as the visitor’s marching band left the field. 

Rose stood alone, her arms draped across the top of the fence as she watched the Sacred Heart band step onto the field. A smile crossed her face at something Finn said, turning serious when she caught Rey out of the corner of her eye. Finn immediately made himself scarce.

Leaving Poe behind, Rey walked over to Rose, the pizza sitting like a rock in her stomach. 

They spoke at the same time.

“Listen, I’m sorry-”

“I didn’t mean to-”

They both broke off with nervous laughter.

Rose inclined her head. “You first.”

“I didn’t mean to snap at you. And I’m sorry. I should have tried harder to tell you back then. Or, you know, in any of the 12 years since.” She finished with what she hoped was a apologetic smile, watching Rose's face for any indication of acceptance.

There was a pause before words started tumbling out of Rose, her face a mask of contrition. “I’m sorry for being a bitch. And you’re right, you don’t owe me an explanation, not when I refused to listen to you back then.” Rose groaned. “I can’t believe how terrible I was to you. You tried to tell me, I remember it specifically, and I called you delusional.”

Rey laughed. “Well, in your defense I did talk about him an obnoxious amount freshman year. That was one big crush.”

Rose’s eyes flitted up for a second, Rey following them to where Paige and Poe were catching up down the fence line. A second later Snap joined them, hugs and back slaps all around. 

“And now?”

Rey turned back to Rose’s expectant grin, recognizing that look as no good. “Now, it’s complicated.”

To Rey’s surprise, Rose accepted that answer without question, both turning around to watch the band start its second song.

It took a few bars for Rey to recognize the song - it was a high school marching band, after all - but when she did all the blood drained from her face. She looked up, instantly locking eyes with Poe across the crowd, his face a mask of white.

Sufjan Stevens. Chicago.

Rey turned back to the band, leaning over to Rose. Her pulse beat ferociously in her neck, a steady pounding that reached all the way to her ears. “Why in God’s name are they playing this? It’s old. Some of these kids weren’t even born when this song came out.”

“It was the theme to that new Netflix show, the one that had Gweneth Paltrow. I’m sure that’s why.” Rose shrugged her off.

Rey focused on taking deep, even breaths, not letting the song take her back anywhere she didn’t want to go. To her right, she felt someone settle against the fence next to her, not needing to look up to know it was Poe.

“That’s an interesting song choice,” he said delicately. His voice was deliberately casual in a way that let her know this was anything but. “Really brings me back.”

Rey could feel Rose listening to each and every word, determined not to give too much away. She’d fill her in on all the baggage later. Much later.

Rey smirked, attempting to keep her voice just as light. “I always had a soft spot for it. Not a very happy song, though.”

“I don’t know, it always sounded a bit like hope to me.” 

Rey turned to look at him, his face carefully arranged in that knowing grin. It loosened a knot in her chest she hadn’t even realized was there. This wasn’t so bad.

When she turned back, Rose was watching the entire exchange with rapt attention. She leaned further over the fence. “Hey Poe.”

“Hey Rosie. How you been?”

“Can’t complain. You?”

Neither Rey nor Rose missed the way his eyes darted to Rey for a split second. “Definitely can’t complain.”

“There you guys are,” came Finn’s voice from somewhere behind them. They turned around as one. “I’ve been looking all over. You guys wanna grab some food? I’m starving.”

Rey tried not to look too sheepish. “Uh, Poe and I already ate.”

Finn’s smirk made Rey’s face go scarlet. “Well then, Rose and I will just have to go it alone.” He crooked an elbow toward Rose. “May I?”

“You may,” said Rose, her face the picture of calm. 

They weren’t two steps away before Rose shot a look of pure elation over her shoulder, turning back in time to miss Finn’s unmistakable but covert thumbs up.

“What the hell is going on there?” Poe turned to her, a confused smile on his face.

Rey rolled her eyes dramatically. “They’re in love with each other, have been forever, but neither is willing to admit their feelings to the other.” She sighed the sigh of a long suffering friend. “So we stew in sexual tension thick enough to cut with a knife.”

Poe barked out a laugh. “You must really love them to put up with that.”

“I do,” she said, her voice softening. “They were there for me through... everything. The least I can do is put up with a little awkward sexual tension.”

Poe’s face rearranged into something more serious. “I heard about your grandfather. I’m sorry I wasn’t there.”

“Poe, I’m not trying to call you out. It was a long time ago, you were in college…”

“Yeah, so were you. I know we fell out of touch, but you were there for everything with Mom, and I couldn’t even show up to the damn funeral.” He took a deep breath, reining himself back in. “All that to say, I’m sorry.”

Her voice was quiet when she answered, “Thanks Poe. That means a lot.”

She turned back to the field. It was Homecoming, so the band had formed a tunnel, the Alma Mater playing on repeat as the court and king and queen were announced. 

The silence stretched. 

They had gone from comfortable joking to tearful confessions to awkward silence in the span of five minutes. Then again, that was kind of their thing.

_ Then _

_ She realized something was changing, but it hadn’t sunk in until she arrived at the library one day in early spring. _ _ Poe was sitting on their usual table, but instead of working on his physics or calculus homework, he was simply waiting for her. _

_ “Where’s your stuff?” she asked, dropping her own bag onto the table. For once it was light, like the teachers all got together and decided to go easy on them that day. _

_ “In my bag.” He hopped off the table, practically bouncing on the balls of his feet. “Thought we could do with a change of scenery.” _

_ And so Rey found herself at Poe’s house, her eyes growing wider by the second. _

_ “I thought you said your parents were farmers,” she had said as they pulled up outside the mansion - yes, mansion - that Poe called home. _

_ He shrugged, maneuvering his truck into a spot in the four-car garage. “No, I said we had a farm. We breed horses.” _

_ “That win the Kentucky Derby?” She could feel her eyes growing wider as she took in the sprawling estate, outbuildings dotting the landscape here and there. A barn that looked nicer than her house stood on the other side of a wide fenced-off pasture, a beautiful white foal prancing in the brown winter grass. _

_ “Not the past couple years, but we have a few winners on our rosters. Come on, we can study in the living room.” _

_ The house was no less amazing than the rest of the property, though she had to admit there was a homey feel that she wasn’t expecting. Everything was plush and comfortable and well-loved despite being obviously expensive, knick knacks and family photos peppering every flat surface. _ _ And on the far wall stood a veritable shrine to Poe Dameron through the years, each of his school photos displayed proudly (in 8x10) ending with his shiny, new senior picture. _

_ That’s where Poe found her. “As you can tell, I’m an only child.” _

_ “So am I, but you would not find an entire wall dedicated to me at anybody's house.” _

_ “What, your grandfather hasn’t set up his own alter to Rey Kenobi?” Poe bumped his shoulder against hers in a comfortable way. _

_ She laughed. What people like Poe didn’t realize is that school pictures were expensive. Her last professional photo was from sometime around kindergarten. “I think we both know I’m lucky he remembers my name most days.” She was aiming to make it sound as light and breezy as Poe had, but her voice cracked halfway through, lending her words a seriousness. _

_ Poe put a hand on her shoulder. “Rey?” _

_ When she turned to face him, it was a shock to realize that she was crying. She brought one hand up to wipe her face. “I was joking. I just wanted to make a joke.” _

_ The next thing she knew, Poe’s arms were around her, Rey burying her face in his shoulder. It was like a valve had been released, all the stress and tension of the last few months rushing to get out as she sobbed into his shirt. _ _ His arms were strong strong around her, hands rubbing circles into her back while she got it all out. Somewhere in the back of her mind she remembered that this was Poe Dameron, coolest guy in school and her crush to end all crushes, and she was currently snotting all over his nice button-down, but it was too late. There was no turning back now. _

_ It felt like hours before her sobs subsided, and hours more until the tears stopped falling, but when she finally stepped back and wiped her face, barely 10 minutes had passed since she walked in the door. _

_ Poe led her to the sectional, Rey practically sinking into the overstuffed cushions when she sat down. It was so much nicer than the twenty-year-old couch in her grandad’s living room, she almost burst into tears again. _ _ Sensing the impending waterworks, Poe jumped to action, distracting her with a problem on his calculus homework. _ _ It worked too, he knew her too well for it to not, Rey quickly getting lost in the concrete rules of differential equations. _

_ The sound of the door to the garage opening broke Rey out of her reverie, Poe’s all too innocent looking telling her this was all part of the plan. _

_ “Poe?” came a man’s voice from the mudroom, accompanied by the shuffle of boots and coats. “You home?” _

_ Rey looked at him in a panic. She wasn’t ready to meet his parents, especially not after seeing where they lived. There was no way a scholarship kid like her would ever be deemed worthy for their son. _

_ Poe mouthed “it’s okay,” to her before turning and bellowing, “Yeah, we’re in here, Dad,” loud enough to wake the dead. _

_ She felt a pat on her hand as a man appeared in the doorway, wide smile and crinkly brown eyes declaring him Poe’s father. _

_ He ran a hand through straight, black hair graying at the temples, a nervous habit she recognized from Poe. “There you are, and this must be the famous Rey.” _

_ A second head popped out of the mudroom and Rey’s heart stopped dead in her chest. _

_ If Rey thought Poe looked like his father, it was because she hadn’t seen his mother yet. She was tall, taller than both her son and husband, nose and cheeks and jaw all a more feminine version of Poe’s. The lines a little softer, the nose a little more petite. But where the pictures scattered around the house told Rey there should be a riot of black curls, sat a pretty pink scarf, the missing eyebrows telling the rest of the story. _

_ Perhaps she had a little more in common with Poe than she thought. _

_ Speaking of, Poe stood up, making his way to where his parents stood. “How was treatment?” _

_ “Oh, you know. Same old, same old.” She kept her voice light and breezy, obviously practiced at keeping her boys calm. “How about you help me over to the couch so I can say hello to your girlfriend.” _

_ “Mooooom,” whined Poe, twins spots of color blooming on his cheeks. _

_ “What?” His mother looked the picture of innocence as Poe helped her take the seat next to Rey. She turned warm brown eyes that could have been copied and pasted from Poe on Rey. “It’s great to meet you, Rey. We’ve heard so much about you.” _

_ Rey accepted the proffered hand, the grip surprisingly strong for a woman so thin. “Likewise, Mrs. Dameron.” It was only half a lie. She had heard a lot about Poe’s parents, just with one glaring omission. _

_ Poe’s mom waved her off. “Please call me Shara. I never actually took this one’s name. Liked my own too much.” She winked at her, Rey giggling despite herself. _

_ Shara turned her attention to the coffee table piled with books, then whipping around to face Poe. “Poe, did you not offer Rey anything to eat or drink? There are snacks in the kitchen, and bring out some waters too, while you're at it. Whatever your father put in the Crockpot earlier won’t be ready for at least another hour.” She turned back to Rey. “I’m afraid it’s nothing too fancy on treatment days, but Kes is an excellent cook. You aren’t a vegetarian are you? Poe didn’t mention.” _

_ “Oh, I couldn’t impose,” said Rey, starting to panic. Granted, she didn’t know how she’d get home what with Poe being her ride and all. _

_ “I insist. Kes cooks enough for a small army and, well, my appetite isn’t what it used to be.” A wry grin played across her lips. “So, you’ll be doing us a favor, really.” Shara sat back, getting comfortable. “Now that that’s settled, tell me a little about yourself.” _

_ It was no mystery where Poe got his charm, that uncanny ability to bend people to his will. _

_ Rey was saved a second later by Poe’s arrival, a plate of cut vegetables and hummus in hand. _

_ “Mom, quit grilling her.” _

_ She gave him a look that screamed: who, me? “I’m just getting to know the lovely girl you won’t shut up about.” _

_ Poe gave a long-suffering sigh, but she knew he was secretly pleased. All his cards were now on the table. Now it was up to Rey to do what she wanted with that knowledge. _

_ The rest of the evening passed in a happy blur of warm food and warmer conversation. While the Damerons asked plenty about her, it never felt like prying. As promised, the meal was simple but delicious, a hearty stew that Rey had no trouble downing three helpings of. It had been a long time since she’d had anything close to a real meal. These days she tended to throw whatever they could afford into a pot and hope for the best. _

_ Soon enough, it was time to go, Shara and Kes both insisting on hugging her (and sending a sizable Tupperware container full of leftovers for her grandfather) as she walked out the door. The night had been so perfect, she couldn’t even muster the anger to yell at Poe for springing it on her. _

_ And when he pulled into her drive at the end of the night, she leaned over and kissed him for the first time in the soft glow of the dashboard lights. _

Now

The Homecoming Queen took the field to thunderous applause, the racket from the stands drawing Rey out of her memories. When she turned to Poe, she found his eyes already on her.

“What?” Her heart was beating faster than necessary, something about the way he looked at her even all these years later. Twelve years was a long time. So why did it feel like yesterday?

He watched her carefully. “What were you thinking about just now?”

She didn’t hesitate to answer, “Our first kiss.” It was the truth, and for once in her life she decided to tell it. 

A smile spread across Poe’s face. “In my truck, after that first dinner with my parents.” 

“Yeah, the dinner you tricked me into, if I remember correctly.”

“Listen, we both know you would have never agreed to it otherwise. Desperate times call for desperate measures.” Poe shrugged, aiming for nonchalant but unable to keep the smile off his face.

Rey swatted at him. “That doesn’t make it any better.”

Poe’s laugh was cut off by the sound of a whistle. Time to start the third quarter.


	5. Third Quarter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Plans are made for after the game. In the past, Rey and Shara have a heart-to-heart at family game night, while an ice storm strands Rey at the house overnight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A warning: you hear Shara's diagnosis/prognosis here and it's not good. Mentions of cancer.

Now

"Let's hear it for our Sacred Heart of the Jedi football team as we start the second half! Go Knights!" The crowd cheered at the insistence of the announcer.

Rey kept her eyes trained on the players as they took the field. The patterns and formations meant nothing to her, but it was something to look at while she sorted through her thoughts.

How was it that the man standing next to her at the fence brought a few metric tons of their combined baggage with him, and yet somehow, also some of her best memories from high school? She snuck a glance over at him, let her eyes linger while he focused on the game.

Now that she was over the shock of his sudden reappearance in her life, she could take in the finer details. His hair was shorter than it was in high school, but no less unruly, with grey now cropping up here and there among the dark curls. She’d had many a dream about that jaw and the way the stubble dotted there scraped against her own sensitive skin. Even in high school he’d had a beard to rival a grown man’s, and now… well now she could make out a dark shadow spreading across cheeks and chin, just a hint at what lied beneath. Then there was the warmth in those brown eyes that reminded her so forcefully of Shara her chest ached.

With a start, she realized she’d been caught, those brown eyes locking with her own. Poe didn’t call her on it, instead letting her look away sheepishly without another word.

She turned her attention back to the game.

_ God, these kids look young, _ she thought to herself, the sound of a whistle bringing the play to a halt.  _ Was I ever that young and carefree? _

She knew the answer to that was a resounding no. 

The only time she’d even come close had been the few months she was a regular at the Dameron house.

_ Then _

_ On a rainy Saturday in late March, Rey found herself once again at the Damerons’ house. She and Poe had been studying all day for midterms, and it had taken barely any cajoling at all to get her to agree to stay for dinner and family game night. _

_ Rey knew she should probably have let Poe take her home, the weather was getting worse by the second, but she couldn’t say no. Her grandad would be fine for a couple more hours, and Verna had agreed to stop in and check on him before her shift. _

_ Kes had insisted on grilling despite the steady rain, claiming he was sick of both oven and crockpot meals.  _

_ “Dad, it’s freezing. And I’m pretty sure that’s ice coming down.” Poe looked out the window. “Yup, that’s sleet.” Rey’s stomach clenched. It would totally clear up before she needed to get home, right? She hated the thought of Poe having to drive in this because of her. _

_ “That’s what coats are for.” Kes waved him off as he bundled into jacket and scarf. “You just worry about the fries.” He paused to check his pockets. “Have you seen my hat?” _

_ The burgers were divine, Rey inhaling two along with a plate full of fries with no problem. She’d thought a burger was a burger, but it was pretty obvious Kes didn’t buy his meat from the last chance case at the discount grocery store. _

_ Once the dishes were cleared and cleaned by her and Poe, it was game time, Kes digging into the hall closet to bring out a selection. _

_ “Ok, we’ve got Life, Trivial Pursuit…” Poe groaned. “What, just because you always lose doesn’t make it a bad game.” _

_ Poe threw his hands in the air. “That’s because you cheat! There are no mulligans in the rules, I checked.” _

_ “He’s got you there, babe,” added Shara from the couch. She had barely eaten a bite at dinner and looked more tired than Rey had ever seen her. The bags under her eyes had turned the purple of fresh bruises, eyes rimmed in red. “What about Monopoly? We haven’t played that in forever.” _

_ “Ah, an oldie but a goodie.” Kes shuffled something in the closet, coming out with a triumphant grin. “What do you say Rey? Up for a game of Monopoly?” He held the box up enticingly, something inside rattling. _

_ Rey shrugged. “Sure. Is it easy to learn? I’ve never played.” _

_ Three incredulous looks met her declaration. _

_ “That must be fixed immediately!” declared Kes, opening the box and starting to set up the game board while Shara made her way over to help. Rey felt her face heat. Why did she have to open her mouth? _

_ Shara paused as she passed Rey to put a comforting hand on her shoulder. “Don’t worry, it’s pretty straightforward. You’ll be up to speed in no time,” she finished with a wink, instantly putting Rey at ease. “You two, official rules only so Rey learns it right. I’m looking at you, Kes.” _

_ Poe sidled up to her side. “Watch him, he's a shameless cheater. I didn’t realize until I was 13 years old that the banker doesn’t get special loans.” _

_ Kes waved her over. “Come on, you guys. Rey gets first pick of the tokens.”  _

_ Rey looked in the box, a little collection of silver pieces gathered for the picking. A battleship, a boot, a cannon, it was a strange assortment of pieces that made no sense based on what she knew about the game. She hesitated over the thimble, but eventually went with the little Scottie dog. _

_ “Excellent choice,” Poe murmured, his breath warm on her ear. Rey shivered. “That’s my favorite, too.” _

_ Kes and Shara were both engrossed in picking their own pieces, bickering over house rules versus official rules, so Rey turned her head and placed the quickest of kisses on Poe’s lips, turning back as if nothing had happened. _

_ Though Kes paid them no mind, Shara’s eyes sparkled with mischief, an unreadable sort of smile on her face.  _

_ Rey tried not to look too guilty. _

_ Monopoly, as it turned out, was not for the faint of heart. At least, not the way the Dameron family played it. _

_ Kes and Poe were ruthless, no holds barred as they fought for dominance over the board. Rey caught on quick, and thank god, because no allowances were made for her novice status as the game went on. Shara bowed out about halfway through, retiring to the couch and shouting tips at Rey every so often. But it was no use, the boys would not be stopped, and Rey went bankrupt shortly after Shara. _

_ Rey dropped next to her as Poe and Kes started to bicker over whether you could have multiple houses and hotels on a space. _

_ “Sorry if you thought they’d go easy on you,” said Poe’s mom, smiling over at her. From this angle, Rey could just make out the edge of the port sticking out of the neck of her shirt. Even just the simple act of breathing seemed to take it out of her, the bones of her too-thin chest rising and falling with agonizing precision. “Monopoly is sacrosanct around here.” _

_ “Believe me, I wasn’t expecting to win. But damn.” _

_ Shara laughed, which turned into a painful sounding cough. Rey watched helplessly until Shara could regain control of her breathing. _

_ Her voice was strained when she finally spoke. “Did Poe tell you anything about my illness?” _

_ Rey shook her head. _

_ She knew Shara was sick, that much was pretty obvious, but Poe never spoke of it and she felt it impolite to ask. _

_ Shara’s expression softened, eyes darting over to make sure the boys weren’t listening.  _

_ “Ovarian cancer, stage IV.” The blood drained out of Rey’s face. She didn't know a lot about cancer, but she knew stage IV was about as bad as it got. “They’re basically just keeping me comfortable now, the chemo palliative more than anything else.” Shara put a hand over Rey’s, her grip strong despite the shakiness of her words. “We’re just trying to get me to Poe’s graduation.” _

_ Something in Rey’s chest threatened to cave in at the admission, tears springing to her eyes. Shara pulled Rey into her side, an arm coming around now shaking shoulders. _

_ “It’s ok, we’ve known for a while. And I swear, I’m not trying to make you cry, but I just wanted you to know how happy I am that I got to meet you, Rey. Poe is going to take this hard, and it brings me some peace to know you’ll be there for him.” _

_ Rey broke down, burying her face in Shara’s bony shoulder. Poe’s mom brought her even closer, rubbing circles on her back the way Rey always imagined a mother would. It was a lot for a woman to put on a high schooler, but then again, when had Rey’s load ever been light? So Rey sobbed for the unfairness of it all: that Poe had amazing mom, only to have her taken away; that Rey never had a real mom to begin with; that just when Rey had found a bit of family, that too would be snatched from her. _

_ Thank god the Dameron men were too busy shouting about taxes and hotels to notice the two of them on the couch, Shara’s sobs soon joining her own. Rey could feel the tears drip into her hair, the two of them holding on to each other for dear life. _

_ It felt like forever before she took a deep, shaking breath, all cried out.  _

_ Shara handed her a tissue from a nearby box. “Well, I think we both needed that.” _

_ Rey laughed as she mopped up the mess that was her face, just knowing that her eyes would be read and puffy for hours. _

_ “Now, let’s find something fun and mindless on the TV. I’m in the mood for a chick flick.” Poe’s mom grabbed the remote, scrolling through the stations until she found something to her liking. "Oh, I love Reese Witherspoon!” _

_ Rey was still sniffling every so often when Poe came to join them on the couch. _

_ “You okay?” he asked, still flush with victory from the game. He’d finally beat Kes, despite the fact that his father had cheated every step of the way. _

_ “Yeah, I’m good.” Her voice was barely a croak, but Poe didn’t ask any questions, instead just looking from her to his mom and back again. _

_ “Oh, no. That doesn’t look good.” _

_ They all turned toward where Shara was staring, the large bay window now coated with ice. It was coming down in a hurry, the trees in the yard glimmering in the light streaming from the house. _

_ Rey’s heartbeat kicked up. _

_ Kes approached, taking a long look outside. “Shit, I’ll find the lanterns and flashlights in case the power goes out.” _

_ “The roads are going to be treacherous,” said Shara, shaking her head. “Sorry, Rey. It looks like you’ll be spending the night.” _

_ Rey’s breaths started to come in sharp gasps. No, she couldn’t. She had to get home. Lord only knew what Grandad could get into overnight. And what if their power went out? Would he even remember where the flashlights are? Oh god, what if he tried to light a candle and forgot about it? _

_ She realized she was shaking when Poe turned to her. “Rey?” _

_ “Thank you, but I-I can’t stay. My grandfather…” _

_ Shara’s voice was soft with understanding. “Oh sweetheart, I’m sure he’ll understand. And if he wants to talk to Kes or I-” _

_ “No!” Rey practically shouted, Shara’s eyes going wide. “I mean, that’s not what I’m worried about.” _

_ Something seemed to dawn on Shara, her face softening. “Under no circumstances do I want Poe driving in this, but maybe Kes could if you guys went really slow?”  _

_ That snapped Rey out of her momentary panic. Of course, they shouldn’t be driving in this weather. They’d end up dead in a ditch somewhere for sure. She took a deep breath, willing herself to calm down, think it through. _

_ Well, this certainly wasn’t ideal, but it was happening. She needed to call Verna, see if she or her husband could check in on Grandad. _

_ “No, no, you’re right,” she finally said, mind made up. “I was just worried about leaving my grandfather alone in this. You know, in case the power goes out." That was a normal reason, right? No red flags raised. "Can I use your phone?” _

_ “Of course.” Shara smiled at her, Rey’s heart steadying further. “You know where it is.” _

_ Rey was up and in the kitchen before Poe could follow her, not particularly wanting an audience for this. She dialed the number she knew by heart, sending a silent prayer up to whatever deity was currently listening. Please let it be a good night, please let it be a good night. One ring, then two, then five, and she was about to hang up and try again when someone finally picked up on the other end. _

_ “Hello?” _

_ Rey took a deep breath, preparing herself for however this call was going to go. “Grandad, it’s me, Rey.” _

_ “Oh Rey, I’ve been worried. This storm.” _

_ She breathed a shaky sigh of relief, thanking whatever force was on her side tonight. “That’s what I’m calling about. I’m stuck at Poe’s house. You remember Poe, right?” _

_ Poe had been over enough now that he should, though Rey knew that was never a guarantee with Grandad these days. _

_ “Of course, I do. Strapping young man. Knows my Satine.” _

_ Rey’s heart dropped. They’d been doing so well.  _

_ “Rey? Verna wants to talk to you.” _

_ There was some shuffling on the line before Verna’s no nonsense voice came on. “Rey? Honey, you safe?” _

_ Rey tried not to laugh. And here she’d been worried no one would miss her. _

_ “Yeah, I’m at my boyfriend’s house.” They hadn’t officially used those terms yet, but wasn’t that what they were? Boyfriend and girlfriend?  _

_ “Good, stay there. The roads are just awful. I’m gonna take Ben over to Chet and my’s place for the night. Stay safe, honey.” _

_ “Thanks so much Verna, I will.” _

_ The line went dead, Rey releasing a final breath she hadn’t even realized she’d been holding.  _

Now

The ghost of a smile remained on his face even as he faced the field, Rey too far gone to care at this point. She was 28 years old and she’d be damned if she blushed every time that man looked her way. They’d seen each other naked for fuck’s sake. There wasn’t much mystery left.

Rose and Finn chose that moment to reappear, bickering as they came closer.

“Look, they’re exactly where we left them,” said Finn, stuffing a handful of popcorn in his mouth. “Told you.”

Rose reached over to grab a handful of kernels from the box. “Please. You insisted that they’d be gone already.”

“Did not.”

“Did so.”

Rey glanced over at Poe, who was trying and failing to keep a smirk off his face. 

“Popcorn?” Finn held out the box to Rey.

“Sorry it took so long, the line was insane.” Rose grabbed another handful from Finn and shoved it into her mouth, her next words barely recognizable around the popcorn. “Did you see they had Gino’s?”

Poe and Rey took one look at each other and burst out laughing, Finn and Rose exchanging a confused look in the corner of Rey’s vision.

“Uh, anything you guys want to share with us?” Finn’s eyebrows were practically on the top of his head while he watched them dissolve into another round of giggles.

Iolo Arana chose that moment to approach the group.

“Hey guys, a bunch of us are heading to Fox and Hound for postgame drinks. You in?”

He looked expectantly around the group, from Finn’s narrowed eyes to the uncertain grin Poe was giving Rey.  But it was Rose who put on her best smile, tilted her head a little and honest to god batted her eyelashes as she answered for them, “You know it.”

A silent look passed between the four of them, Rose oblivious as she continued to smile at her ex. Her interest didn’t go unnoticed by Iolo. Or Finn.

There was a predatory gleam in Iolo’s eyes that Rey did not like one bit when he responded, “Can’t wait.”

She waited until Iolo was out of earshot to turn on Rose. “What the hell was that?”

“What?” Rose decided to play it coy, but Rey was having none of it.

“You were flirting with Iolo. I’m pretty sure we both know how that ended the last time.” 

Poe, noticing the look of pure murder on Finn’s face, decided to step in. “Hey man, I think that’s Rich from the baseball team over there. We should go say hi.” He grabbed Finn’s arm, practically dragging him away from the conversation with an apologetic to Rey.

Huh, she had completely forgotten Finn and Poe had been on the same team in high school. Weird. 

Rose was still talking. “Yes, I remember that vividly, thank you very much. But come on, tonight’s like a free pass, an opportunity to pretend we’re still in high school, make a few bad decisions.” Rose let her mouth drop into a wry smile. Rey knew that look, and it was dangerous. “Speaking of, Poe is totally looking at you like a starving man in front of a three course meal.”

Rey rolled her eyes, secretly pleased. Distantly, a whistle blew. How was it already the fourth quarter? This was the fastest football game she’d ever been to.

Rose’s voice drew her attention. “I’m serious. That man is definitely imagining you naked.”

_ Well, _ thought Rey, figuring she had nothing left to lose,  _ in for a penny, in for a pound. _

“Yeah, I don’t think so. Especially since he doesn’t have to imagine.”

Silence as Rose’s jaw hit the floor, a hand coming up to cover her gaping mouth. “Spill it.”

Rey laughed, taking a deep breath before she started.


	6. Fourth Quarter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the game comes to an end, Rey recounts a story to Rose.

_ Then _

_ “Everything okay?” _

_ She jumped at the sound of Poe’s voice behind her, instantly relaxing when she saw who it was. _

_ “Yeah, Verna’s gonna take him to her house.” She kept her voice low, not wanting Poe’s parents to overhear. _

_ Poe opened his arms, Rey not hesitating to step into his warm embrace.  _

_ “Good,” he said, his lips close to her ear. Now that she knew Grandad was ok, she could fully appreciate the situation they were in.  _

_ Poe held her in silence for a minute before speaking again. “So, I’m your boyfriend, huh?” _

_ Rey stiffened in his arms. _

_ “Hey, it’s good. I’ve been meaning to ask you, but you never seemed ready.” _

_ She looked up at his handsome face, the dark shadow dotting his jaw, the way his eyes practically devoured her, and tilted her head up to touch his lips. _

_ They’d gotten good at this in the short time they’d been doing it, practice making perfect. Lots and lots of practice thanks to Poe having his own car and Rey’s grandfather never looking out the window when they pulled in. That first kiss had been tentative, a spur of the moment decision that Rey never regretted. Especially not when Poe told her that had been his first, too. _

_ She had tried not to look too incredulous at the fact that Poe was just as much a virgin as her. He was, after all, the hottest, most popular guy at school and the biggest flirt she knew. There was no one else who could make the students and teacher alike blush, always able to wheedle his way out of detention or into someone’s good graces. _

_ What she hadn’t realized was that while Poe may have been a shameless flirt, he was a romantic at heart. How couldn’t he be with Kes and Shara as parents? Rey had never seen a couple so in love. It made sense that he was waiting for the right person. Rey had even started to hope that might be her. _

_ Not that she had any such grand examples of love. Her own mother had been sixteen when she found out about Rey, and by seventeen she had dropped her at Grandad’s house and taken off. She came back over the years, sometimes for weeks, sometimes for months, but she always took off before long. Rey had learned early on not to get attached. So it barely hurt at all when she stopped coming back sometime around Rey’s tenth birthday. She and Grandad had been better off without her. _

_ But now was not the time to worry about that woman, not when Poe’s arms were around her and hers were draped over his neck and their chests were flush… _

_ A throat clearing in the doorway had them jumping apart. _

_ “Some ground rules,” said Shara, thin arms crossed over her chest. Kes stood next to her trying to hide a smirk. “First, you’re in the guest bedroom, Rey. No exceptions.” _

_ Rey’s face blazed as she prayed for the ground to open up and take her, having no such luck.  _

_ “Second, both doors are to remain closed. Do not make me send your father up to sleep in the hallway.” She fixed them both with a look no less than terrifying. “Now, I’m trusting you two. Make good choices.”  _

_ Having said her piece, the smile returned to her face. “On that note, I’m going to bed. Remember what I said.” _

_ Poe crossed the room to kiss his mother goodnight, some emotion Rey thought she was no longer capable of feeling crossing her heart.  _

_ “Love you, Mom.”  _

_ Shara was still taller than him, but Poe’s frame dwarfed her thin body, Rey’s mind going to the confession she’d shared earlier.  _

_ “Love you too, Poe.” She gave him a big kiss on the forehead before he moved on to his dad.  _

_ Shara turned her attention to Rey, opening her arms in an invitation to hug. Rey stepped into her embrace immediately. _

_ “Good night, Rey.” _

_ “Good night.” _

_ They marched them to the base of the steps, Kes whispering something to Poe before watching them take the steps and retiring to their own room on the first floor. _

_ Rey was a little shocked they trusted them so thoroughly, then again, Poe was a Good Boy. He respected his parents, got good grades, ate his vegetables. They had no reason not to trust him. _

_ Poe led her down a long hall, stopping at one of the six or so identical doorways. How many bedrooms did this house have?  _

_ The bedroom was big, far larger than she had been expecting in a guest bedroom, with a massive double bed and white matching bedside tables. The comforter was palest purple and grey, perfectly complementing the crisp grey walls. A full bath sat just inside the doorway, everything she could possibly need for the night.  _

_ Of course it was nicer than anything at her house. Then again, she hadn’t been expecting anything less. _

_ “Looks like Dad set you up,” said Poe, pointing out the fresh towels on a slipper chair in the corner. Folded neatly on the bed were a pair of soft pink pajamas, obviously on loan from Shara. “Bathroom’s right there.” He pointed to the door she’d already scoped out. “And my bedroom in directly across the hall.”  _ _ Rey swatted at him when he waggled his eyebrows at her.  _

_ Poe heaved an exaggerated sigh. “Well, you can’t blame a guy for trying.” _

_ Rey giggled as Poe dropped a light kiss on her nose, looking over his shoulder to check if the coast was clear before pulling her in for the real deal. _

_ She let herself melt into him, one hand finding its way into his curls. Just last week, she’d found out if she tugged just so, Poe would practically purr at her, something she’d been using to her advantage ever since.  _

_ Though Poe wasn’t without his own talents, finding a spot on her neck that made her breath catch every. Single. Time.  _

_ So it was a few breathless moments later when they finally pulled apart, panting as if they’d just run a marathon. _

_ “You gotta go before your parents come up here to check on us.”  _ And before I lose all willpower to make you go _ , she added to herself. Even now, it was a close thing, how much she wanted him. It was mind blowing to her how tentative she’d been around him even a month ago. How quickly things change. _

_ “I know,” he replied, placing a series of feather-lite kisses across her cheeks. “Good night.” _

_ “Good night,” she murmured into his lips, neither making a move. _

_ The sound of someone moving around downstairs broke the spell, Poe taking one step back and then another until he was out in the hall.  _

_ “Goodnight, Rey.” He lifted a hand as he stepped into his own room - directly across the hall, as promised. _

_ Hand on her own door handle, she raised a hand in a mirror of his own gesture. “Goodnight, Poe.” _

_ Not wanting to take any chances, she clicked the door shut, leaning back against it as she took a deep breath.  _

_ That was close. _

_ Despite not being official, they’d talked about this at length, what felt like the next logical step in their relationship as their makeout sessions got hotter and heavier. They were both on a level playing field, but something held Rey back from taking that final step. She wanted to believe it had nothing to do with her mother’s own cautionary tale - Rey was better than that woman in every way - but knew the truth. Rey was terrified of following that path, making the same mistakes her mother had. And it didn't help that she was 16. _

_ But she refused to believe that Poe would be the type to love her and leave her. And she did feel more safe and comfortable with him (and his family) than she had in her entire life. There were worse choices to make than Poe Dameron. _

_ Though it was a moot point now that she had firmly shut the door. She was half-tempted to march right across the hall, but instead distracted herself with getting ready for bed.  _

_ The guest bath was massive, easily capable of fitting at least four of the only bathroom she had at home. With room to spare. She washed her face and brushed her teeth best she could with only her finger and some toothpaste she found in a drawer, not wanting to bother anyone for a toothbrush.  _ _ The pajamas were soft and comfy and so much nicer than the beaten up sweats she generally wore to bed, she almost felt bad about wearing them. But the PJs, combined with the heavenly mattress and warm comforter left her feeling more relaxed than she had in ages, her body sinking in to the comfort of the bed.  _

_ She thought that maybe she’d have trouble falling asleep in a strange, new place, but almost instantly her eyes started to fall close. For once, she had no worries. The house was fine. Grandad was taken care of. She was full and fed and warm. Nothing at all preventing her from falling into the deepest sleep of her life. _

_ Except the sound of the door opening. _

_ She sat up in bed, her heart racing. _

_ Poe stood in the doorway in soft flannel pants and a t-shirt, hands raised. “It’s just me.” He turned around and closed the door behind him before making his way over to the bed. _

_ “What are you doing,” she hissed, heart still racing at his sudden appearance in the room. “Your parents!” _

_ Poe perched on the edge of the bed, careful not to touch her. “I have broken no rules. You are in the guest room - no exceptions - and both doors are closed.” _

_ She narrowed her eyes at the all-too-innocent look on his face. “I think we both know that this is not what they meant.” _

_ “It is what they said though.” His eyes sparkled in the moonlight streaming through the window. The moon reflecting off the ice had made the night bright. “But I can head back to my room…” _

_ He made to get off the bed, Rey grabbing his arm to stop him. _

_ “I didn’t say that.” _

_ Poe’s face turned serious. “Are you sure?” _

_ Was she sure? Rey’s mind raced at the question. She’d never felt more at ease with another person, there was no denying that. Not even Rose knew as much about her and her life as Poe did. Then there was the stuff that they had already done, hands and lips and tongues, that she’d all enjoyed, thank you very much. So what was stopping her? _

_ They were young, she knew that. Relationships at this age rarely lasted forever, just look at all the boys Rose had dated so far. But with everything she’d had to deal with so far in life, she felt far older than her 16 years, a feeling she knew Poe shared. They had both grown up far beyond the numbers attached to their names this past year. _

_ Something inside her solidified, a feeling that she couldn’t quite put a name to. It hit her that she wanted this, wanted Poe to be her first. So what was she waiting for? _

_ Nothing. Rey was done waiting. _

_ With a tug on his arm, she brought him closer, leaning back so he followed her on to the bed. Tilting her head, she brought her lips to his, closing a circuit that had been lying dormant, just waiting for them to touch. _

_ Electricity sparked along her veins, that was the only way she could describe the sparks that rose everywhere they touched, Poe’s hand on her the soft skin of her waist, her arms around his neck and sliding toward his hair, that place where Poe’s hips rested on hers between her parted legs. _

_ The feel of him completely surrounding her was so right, so intoxicating, that she practically whined when he pulled back a second later. _

_ “So is that a yes?” he asked, tucking a strand of her unruly bedhead behind an ear. In that moment, she would have sworn that his smile hovering above her in the dark was the best sight she’d ever seen. _

_ Rey’s cheeks had started to ache from her own smiles. “Yes, that’s a yes.” _

_ Instead of bringing him back in, he lifted up and off the bed at her response. _

_ “Hey!” Rey sat up, watching as Poe made his way to the closed door. _

_ His hand on the knob, he shot her a grin over his shoulder. “Be right back.” And then he was out the door. _

_ Rey fell back onto the pillows with a frustrated sigh, willing her heart to slow down. She was sure, she knew that much, but that didn’t stop her heart from racing in anticipation or nerves. _

_ Poe was back a second later, clicking the door shut behind him. He dropped his phone on the nearest bedside table, Rey looking on curiously. _

_ “Set an alarm for four.” The grin on his face threatened to undo her. “Just in case we fall asleep.” The rest of the sentence went unsaid, but Rey could fill in the blanks. So he could sneak back into his own room before his parents woke. _

_ In his other hand, he held up a small foil packet, Rey recognizing it as a condom despite the shitty abstinence only health class they were forced to take at Sacred Heart. Her eyebrows rose. Where the hell did he get condoms from? _

_ “Uh, my dad may have told me where he kept an extra box up here.” His face burned beet red in the half-light of the room. “You know, safety first.” _

_ While she genuinely wanted to die from mortification that Kes Dameron knew full well what they were doing up here, she was glad someone had kept his head in this situation. Protection hadn’t even crossed her mind in the last five minutes, which was scary enough even if she didn’t have to think about her family history. As if she needed another reason to be sure about the almost-man in front of her. _

_ Rey sat up, smiling into the kiss she pressed into Poe’s mouth. “I love you.” _

_ “I love you, too.” His voice was barely a whisper as he pressed her back into the bed. _

_ He went to work on that spot on her neck, Rey helpless against the moan that escaped from her lips. In her head, she knew his parents were halfway across the very large house, that there was no way they could hear her up here, but she still slapped a hand over her mouth, stifling the giggles that followed her moan. _

_ “Here.” Poe reached for his phone, one of those ridiculous new models that came out last year and could play MP3s. Rey couldn’t even afford an iPod Shuffle, her own flip phone an ancient Motorola that didn’t have a real screen or polyphonic ringtones.  _

_ A song started playing softly from the built-in speakers, Poe turning his attention back to Rey. “There, that’s better.” _

_ “What about your parents?” she said, keeping her voice low. Her heart kicked up again, though she wasn’t sure it was only about the noise they were making. _

_ Poe smiled down at her. “I promise you, nothing is going to wake them. I always fall asleep to music anyway.” _

_ Trusting him, she let herself fall back into it, one song bleeding into the next as Poe systematically explored her neck and collarbones. Familiar chords started to play. _

_ “Wait, a sec, is this that Chicago song you’re obsessed with?” _

_ Poe lifted his head. “Yeah, it’s our song. We listened to it the first day I took you home.” _

_ “You do know this isn’t actually a romantic song.” She tried not to laugh. “In fact, it’s downright depressing.” _

_ Poe dropped kisses on her cheeks, chin, nose, punctuating each of his words. “I think it’s hopeful.” _

_ Ok, Rey could get behind hopeful.  _

_ They moved on, fumbling a bit when it came time for the condom, and then all Rey knew was Poe, the strength of his body completely surrounding her. It was sweet and awkward and everything she could have possibly hoped for in a first time, and when she finally fell asleep that night, she went knowing that she had made the right choice. _

Now

Rose gaped at her. “Wait, so you’re telling me you lost your virginity to Poe Dameron?”

“Yes.” Rey couldn’t help but be a little smug. 

“The Poe Dameron. Hottest guy in school. Completely untouchable.”

“Yup, that’s him.”

“The same-”

“Rose, we both know there is exactly one Poe Dameron and that’s who I’m talking about.”

“Sorry, I’m just wrapping my head around it.” A pause. “Not gonna lie, I’m a little jealous. You lost your V-card to Poe motherfucking Dameron our sophomore year, and I settled for that waste of space Chad after senior prom.”

“Ugh, Chad.” 

“I know, right!”

Something dawned on her, eyes narrowing as she looked at Rose. “Wait, so who did you think I lost it to?”

Rose shrugged, looking a little sheepish. “I mean, we all thought it was that himbo Nick freshman year of college.”

“Oh, god!” Rey stepped back in horror, a hand going to her heart. “Nick was in no way virginity worthy.”

“Ok, number one,” Rose said, holding up a single finger, “virginity is a social construct and neither of us should be putting any stock in it. And number two,” a second finger joined the first, “duh, we all knew Nick was in no way virginity worthy.”

Rey burst out laughing, feeling the truth of that statement in her bones. Nick had been a shit boyfriend and an even worse lay. “Gee, thanks for saying something 10 years later. Not like you could have saved me a lot of trouble back then.”

Rose stood on her tippy toes and wrapped an arm around Rey’s shoulders. “Anything for a friend.”

Rey could hear Rose chuckling to herself a second later. “What?”

“I’m just thinking about you losing your virginity to the band song.”

Rey swatted at Rose as her friend dissolved into giggles. “Listen it wasn’t a band song back then. Though let me tell you, having to stand next to the ex in question while it plays is quite the experience.”

They were still laughing when Poe and Finn sidled back up, looking rather chummy indeed. 

“Looks like you two made up,” said Finn, throwing an arm around Rose in what Rey recognized as a very bold move for him. Rey looked over at Poe, something in his eyes telling her that this was his doing.

Maybe it was the fact that she’d just relived their first or the general nostalgia of the evening, but she could have sworn that she felt some of that old spark when Poe’s eyes met hers a second later.  That old feeling of inevitability started to creep in, Rey’s mind drifting to the way that artful stubble would feel on her face or her neck or other, more sensitive places...

The sound of the final whistle made Rey practically jump out of her skin. A look at the scoreboard (and the sound of the Fight Song) told her that they’d won, though for the life of her, she couldn’t figure out how they got there. Not that it mattered when Poe was looking at her the exact same way she’d been looking at him, the upcoming trip to the Fox and Hound looming large.

Familiar strains of the Alma Mater reached her, the whole stadium moving as one to point toward the school. It was stupid, but one of the most important traditions of Sacred Heart, to point toward the school while the song played, no matter where they were. The words rose to the front of her mind, though she could have sworn she forgot them long ago, joining the hundreds of other voices around her. Weirdly, it was a comfort, the old familiar rhythms coming back to her like no time had passed. Maybe this place hadn’t been so bad to her after all. 

There would have been no way she would have made it to college had her counselor not been so awesome, spending hours and hours with her researching grants and scholarships. And Finn and Rose, she never would have met her two best friends at the local high school. Then there was Poe. She wouldn’t have learned about love and loss had she not met him here. Back then, she would have said she was better off not knowing, but age and time (and a really good therapist) had taught her differently, shown her those memories in a different light.

Yeah, this place wasn’t so bad after all.

The song finished and the stadium started to empty, Rose turning to them. “You guys ready?”

Rey let a smile settle on to her face. “For anything.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you are wondering, chapter 8 makes up for the PG-13 nature of this chapter in a big way.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	7. Post-game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the game, the truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some warnings on this chapter: Shara passes in this chapter and while there's nothing graphic, there is some talk about what happens during end stage cancer treatment and after someone dies at home. More logistics than anything. There's also some talk about grief and what it does to a person. Later, there's discussion about Rey's grandfather getting violent during an episode, typical of some cases of dementia.
> 
> This is a rough one, but hopefully the next chapter makes up for it.
> 
> Thanks for reading!

Now

A comfortable silence fell as they walked toward the parking lot, but it didn’t last long.

“Uh, is now the right time to admit that my dad dropped me off here?” Poe asked, face coloring in the warm glow of the parking lot lights.

Finn burst out laughing. “Man, you really leaned into this whole reliving high school thing, didn’t you?”

“I’ll have you know my car is in the shop.”

“Sure, sure, I believe you.” Finn laughed. “You can ride with me. It doesn’t matter, we’ll all be Ubering home later anyway.”

“It gets that serious at this?”

Rose fielded that question. “Fox and Hound is a hole in the wall, but it has darts, pool, and karaoke on Friday nights. It gets even more serious than serious. Ask Rey about Lady Marmalade.”

Ok, she was going to kill her best friend. Dead. 

Poe turned her expectantly, waiting for the story. 

“Listen, there were a lot of Octoberfests consumed and someone,” she fake coughed twice, “Rose, insisted we go up and do a duet because I still remembered all the words to the rap.” She held her head high. “I’m happy to report that it brought down the house last year.”

A slow smile spread across his face. “Ok, I have got to see this.”

Rey whirled toward him, pointing a finger. “Don’t you dare, Dameron. I am not singing again.”

He lifted his hands in the generally accepted symbol for “don’t shoot.”

“I’m over here,” said Finn, pointing toward the opposite end of the parking lot. “See you guys there?”

“See you there,” she answered as she and Rose made their way over to her parked car.

She was shocked that Rose had enough restraint to wait until they were both safely ensconced in the car, doors closed, to make a comment. “Oh my god.”

“What?” asked Rey, deciding to play coy.

“Oh come on, you two are about to burst into flames.” She turned the car on, deftly backing out of the spot and heading toward the exit. “Now that I know, I can’t even imagine why you two broke up. You’re perfect for each other.” 

Something deep in Rey’s chest twisted at the thought. It had been so fun catching up tonight, she almost forgot how this all ended.

Rose seemed to sense the impending doom. “What happened?” she asked, her voice soft in the dark car. 

Rey watched the familiar streets blow by, completely different and yet exactly the same as she remembered. Well, no sense in not finishing the story. Rose might as well know it all.

She turned to her oldest friend.

_ Then _

_ With the blessing of her team of doctors, Shara made the decision to stop chemo on June 1. The treatments were no longer slowing the progress of her disease, not to mention her body could barely tolerate the drugs anymore. At this point, they were doing more harm than good. It was time to face the truth. _

_ But that didn’t stop Shara from attending Poe’s graduation five days later, her joy infectious as she watched Poe walk across the stage. Front and center, she clapped the loudest when Poe accepted his diploma, his smile wide as he moved his tassel from one side of the mortarboard to the other. The whole extended family joined them at the farm afterwards, everyone seeming to realize that there would be little cause for celebration soon. _

_ Shara Bey died on June 21st, surrounded by her family.  _

_ It had been a rough few days, Shara unconscious more often than not thanks to the steady diet of morphine. She’d made it to graduation, that was all that counted, but it didn’t make it any easier on those who loved her.  _

_ And there were a lot who loved her, judging by the line out the door when Rey arrived at the funeral parlor.  _

_ Rey hadn’t been in the room at the very end, that was just for Poe and Kes, but she had seen the aftermath. She’d been sitting in the living room with a few aunts and uncles when Poe stumbled from his parents’ bedroom, clutching something in his left fist and looking for all the world like he’d seen a ghost. He crumpled when his eyes locked on to hers, Rey racing across the room to hold him. _

_ He didn't need to say the words, but he did anyway. "She's gone." _

_ Something inside Rey cracked. _

_ “She gave me her ring,” he continued, as if in a daze, opening his hand to show her the small silver band, “told me to save it for the right partner.”  _

_ That’s when Rey lost it, the reality of the situation setting in. Shara was really gone. _

_ He sobbed for hours in her arms, Rey watching silently as the hospice nurse came to make it official and the funeral home was called. Poe hadn’t watched when they removed Shara from the house, but Rey had, her heart breaking for the family she now felt some small part of. _

_ There had been no one else to talk to - Poe was going through his own thing, of course, and Rose had no clue what was going on - so she’d turned to Finn and let him hold her as she cried, painstakingly recounting the whole story for him. He listened quietly, rubbing her back and letting her tell it in her own time.  _

_ It was Finn who stood next to her now, holding her hand as she shook like a leaf. I _ _ t was the smell of the place that did it, that musty, floral musk that was exactly the same no matter what funeral home you were in. There was nothing alive about that stench, and it made her want to hurl up what little she’d got down for breakfast.  _

_ The line took forever, which was no surprise. The Damerons were well-loved and Shara Bey most of all. Half the school was here, Paige included, though she knew she ran no risk of being discovered. She tended to fly under the radar at Sacred Heart. They didn’t even try to hide their relationship anymore, and no one seemed to catch on. Or at least, no one called them on it. _

_ Finn went first, sweeping Poe into a crushing hug before moving on to shake Kes’s hand. Rey always forgot that they knew each other independent of her, their time on the baseball team making them friends. _

_ By the time she made it to the day of the funeral, Rey had been crying for three or so days nonstop. She was certain she had no tears left, but as soon as Poe turned to face her, she lost it again. _

_ He was a shell of himself, shoulders hunched, purple bags under lifeless eyes, and pain and exhaustion etched into each and every line on his face. He collapsed into her arms, Rey gladly taking his weight. _

_ “I miss her so much,” he whispered into her ear, voice harsh and raw from crying. _

_ There was no manual for this, no list of acceptable phrases, so Rey had to wing it. “I know, I know. Me too.” _

_ So it went as they made their way through life post-Shara. He came back to her piece by piece, at once the same old Poe and yet completely different. That was the thing about grief, or so she was learning: you learned to live with it, but it never truly went away. It became a part of you, like brown eyes or a dry sense of humor, just another piece of who you were. _

_ The rest of the summer passed in the blink of an eye, and before Rey knew it, Poe was headed off to school. He’d wanted to defer for a year, especially before Shara had passed, but Kes (and for a while, Shara herself) would have none of that. Poe had gotten into his top choice, and he would go. _

_ Starting back at Sacred Heart without him had been strange. Even though they were never one of  _ those  _ couples, the kind that walked down the hall hand-in-hand or constantly got caught making out at their lockers by teachers, it was still weird not to see him there, and weirder still to go back to taking the bus as a junior. The part time job she took waiting tables after school helped a bit, but it would still be a while until she could afford a car, even an old junker from Craigslist. _

_ Rey kept her head down and her grades up, counting down the days until Poe returned for fall break.  _

_ That Friday afternoon, she stepped out into the warm fall sunshine to find Poe’s truck waiting for her at the entrance to the school. _

_ She ran, practically knocking Poe over with the force of her hug when they collided. He looked good, so much better than he had when he left for school barely a month and a half ago. Gone were the bags and the exhaustion, that old light in his eyes dimmed but returning. His hair was long, longer than she’d ever seen it, the curls downright disreputable when paired with his rakish smile. She couldn’t wait to run her hands through them, and Poe wasted no time making that happen, hightailing them back to the farm and straight to his bedroom. _

_ Kes had finally gone back to work after the months of taking care of Shara, so they had the house to themselves, Poe taking his time with her while she enjoyed all that new hair. Oh, how she’d missed this, missed him all these months. It felt like things were finally looking up for them. At least, until she was dozing in his arms after they finished. _

_ “What’s this?” he asked, running a finger over the wicked bruise just starting to heal on her side. It looked worse than it was, barely even hurting anymore. _

_ Rey didn’t even think to make up a story. They were past all that; she could tell Poe anything. “Yeah, you know how Grandad gets. I was trying to help him into his chair and he didn’t recognize me. It was a whole thing.” _

_ Poe’s voice was very even when he asked, “Your grandad did this?” _

_ “I mean, he just shook me off. I lost my balance and hit that giant credenza in the living room on the way down. Totally just me being clumsy.” _

_ Poe held her a little apart, an incredulous look on his face. “You’re joking, right?” _

_ “No,” said Rey slowly. “Where is this coming from? You know how it is.” _

_ “Rey, if he’s getting violent-” _

_ “Whoa, whoa, whoa, who said anything about getting violent?” She ripped herself out of his arms, pulling the blankets closer around her chest. “Poe, he gets confused, that’s all. He doesn’t know what he’s doing.” _

_ “That doesn’t excuse it, you know we talked about this in class-” _

_ “So what, you go to college for like 6 weeks and now you’re some expert on my life?” _

_ “No, I’m just saying I’m worried about you.” He slowly pulled her back into his arms, Rey going, albeit reluctantly. “Aren’t I allowed to be worried about you?” _

_ “Can we just drop it? I really don’t want to waste our time together fighting about Grandad.” _

_ “Of course,” he said, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “Come on, we better get dressed before Kes gets home. He’s gonna want to cook for both us.” _

_ So that was that, Poe dropping it so they could enjoy the long weekend together. Or so she thought. _

_ It was nearly two weeks later when the doorbell rang at 6 o’clock. Rey had just sat down to dig into her AP English assignment, sighing as she traipsed to the door for what she was sure was another Jehovah’s Witness. _

_ When she opened the door, her heart dropped to her feet. “Kes? Is Poe okay?” _

_ “Oh, he’s just fine. Can I come in, dear?” _

_ Rey hesitated a second. Grandad wasn’t having the best day, and she’d been picking up extra shifts so the house was kind of a disaster, but she knew how many red flags it would raise to say no. “Of course, can I get you anything to drink?” _

_ He waved her off. “No, no I’m fine.” His eyes took in the room, Rey realizing for the first time that he looked nervous. _

_ “What brings you here, Mr. Dameron?” She hadn’t called him Mr. Dameron pretty much ever, but something was off here. _

_ He looked around as if something in her living room would save him when the doorbell rang again. _

_ Kes looked distinctly green as Rey left him to answer the door again. Something told her she wasn’t lucky enough for this one to be a Jehovah’s Witness either. _

_ “Hi, I’m Amilyn Holdo with Resistance Home Care,” said the chipper woman at the door, sticking her hand out. Rey blinked, trying to take in both her ridiculous dress and her shock of purple hair. “You must be Rey. Ah, and there’s Kes.” Without waiting to be invited, she stepped around Rey and into the living room, heading straight to Poe’s dad and wrapping him in a hug. “I heard about Shara, of course. I’m so sorry. We all loved her so much.”  _

_ Kes looked about a second away from tears when he answered, “Yes, she had that effect on people.” _

_ “What’s going on here?” Rey asked, not wanting to wait around for any more reunions or backstory. Who the fuck was this woman, and why was she in her house? _

_ Amilyn smiled at her. “Well, Kes here and Leia, the owner of Resistance Home Care, are old friends. He filled us in on your situation here and we want to help.” _

_ Rey started to shake, her heart threatening to beat out of her chest. Her eyes shot to the door as if she’d see Social Services there, then turning to look between Kes’s guilty expression and Amilyn’s confused one. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she lied, her voice sounding shaky and panicked even to her own ears. “We don’t have a situation here.” _

_ As per usual, her grandfather chose the best possible moment to make his entrance. “Satine? What are all these people doing here?” _

_ “Grandad, don’t worry about it, go watch TV.” She went to guide him, Amilyn beating her to the punch. _

_ “Mr Kenobi? My name is Amilyn Holdo, and I’m going to be handling your care,” she said, leading him into the other room until they were out of earshot. _

_ Rey turned to Kes. “What did you do?” _

_ “Rey, please calm down. Poe told me what has been happening-” _

_ She cut him off. “This isn’t any of your or Poe’s business. This is between my grandfather and me.” Rey turned, stomping off to the kitchen. _

_ It took her two tries to dial the number she knew by heart, waiting with baited breath as the phone rang once, twice. _

_ “Hey Rey,” Poe answered, his usual cheerful self. “What’s up?” _

_ “What the fuck did you do?” _

_ There was a slight hesitation on the line. "Uh, is my dad there? He’s supposed to sign-” _

_ But no confusion. He knew exactly what she was talking about, her worst fears confirmed. She couldn't stop her voice from shaking.  _ _ “What the fuck did you do? You do realize that somebody is going to be around here asking questions, right? Medicaid doesn’t just provide home healthcare without it. There’s paperwork and home visits and they’re going to realize I’m underage pretty quick. I had eight more months, Poe! Eight months until I turned 18 and we could get aid from the State.” _

_ “Rey, I’m worried. You can’t wait six months.” _

_ “Don’t you fucking tell me what I can and cannot do. You ruined everything.” Her voice broke on the final word, tears streaming down her face. She’d trusted him and what had he done? Ratted her out the first chance he got. There was no coming back from this. “Don’t call me again.” _

_ “Rey, please…” She could hear his plea on the other end just as she slammed down the receiver. _

Now

“Today was the first time I spoke to him since that day,” Rey finished, feeling a final weight lift from her shoulders. It was about time she got this off her chest. Her therapist had been right.

Rose’s eyes were wide as they sat in the bar parking lot waiting for Finn and Poe to pull up. “Holy shit, remind me not to get on your bad side.”

Rey chuckled. “Not my proudest moment.”

“Did Social Services ever come?”

“No. They worked out some deal where everything was in Kes’s name until my 18th birthday. I still don’t really understand how it worked, just that it did.” She sighed, leaning further back into the seat. “But I couldn’t trust him after that.”

Rose nodded, though it was pretty obvious she didn’t understand. Then again, Rose had grown up with two parents and a sister who loved her. Rey wouldn’t expect her to understand.

“They just pulled in,” said Rose, lifting a hand in greeting before turning back to Rey. “Are you sure you’re okay with this?”

Rey was overwhelmed by the sudden emotion, pulling Rose into a tight hug. She was so lucky to have a friend like her, and she’d do good to remember it. Even when she was being difficult. “Yeah, I’m sure. Let’s just say I’ve gained a little perspective over the years.”

Rose nodded, willing to take her lead. “Ok, then let’s do this.”


	8. After Party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the game ends, the real fun begins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy reunion chapter! I don't think there are any real warnings here except for smut, of which there is quite a bit. If that's not your thing, I'd look away after they get out of the Uber.

Now

The next hours passed in a blur of Octoberfest and nostalgia. It felt like Rey talked to everyone in the bar, chatting about the good old days in fourth period study hall with Snap and Karé (who had dropped the kids off at his mom’s house before coming), discussing the latest school renovations with Jess, even listening to Iolo prattle on about something or other (Rey honestly tuned out after 30 seconds) to make sure he didn’t sink his fangs back into Rose. Granted, Rose was otherwise occupied with Finn and darts in the corner, but Rey wasn’t taking any chances. She wasn’t about to relive the Iolo days.

All the while, Poe stayed in her orbit, rolling his eyes in sympathy when Iolo wouldn’t stop talking, handing her a fresh beer when he noticed she was empty, even just meeting her eyes across the crowded bar, the glances growing more and more loaded as the night went on.

He was right there when she finally finished chatting with Kaydel, the girl she’d tutored in French (even though she took four years of Spanish).

“Somebody’s popular,” he said by way of greeting, taking a casual sip of his beer.

Finn chose that moment to belly up to the bar for another round. “Told you," he said to Rey before turning back to Poe. "I was totally telling her that earlier tonight.”

She waved him off again. Couldn’t he just drop this already? “Please, I told you, I just tutored a lot of people.”

“Mmmhmm, like you tutored Poe over here?” 

Rey and Poe both blushed scarlet, Poe actually choking on a sip of beer and starting to cough. Finn clapped him on the back a few times.

“That’s what I thought.” Without another word, he turned and disappeared into the crowd, two beers in hand, probably to Rose again.

“Uh, so how long are you in town for?” asked Rey searching for something she hoped would be a neutral topic. Then again, now that she thought about it, that kind of sounded like a come on…

If Poe noticed, he didn’t comment. “Actually, I just took a more local route based out of this airport.”

That was… not what she was expecting to hear. She regrouped quickly. 

“Sick of that jet-setter life?” she joked, taking another sip of her beer. 

Her heart sunk when Poe’s face fell. “Not exactly. Kes fell and broke his hip about a month ago. I was on a long haul, literally halfway across the world, so it was like a day and a half until they could track me down and another day and a half until they could get me back home. Dad had to stay in the hospital two extra days because they wouldn’t release him without a caregiver and his only other option was an in-patient rehab facility.” Poe shook his head. “That was it, I knew then that something had to change. So I put in to be based out of this airport and got it. Home sweet home.”

Well, now she felt stupid. 

“Oh god, sorry. Is Kes okay?” She reached out to lay a hand on his arm in what she hoped was a comforting gesture, pretending not to notice the fireworks she set off with just the casual touch.

“Yeah, he’s good. Doesn’t even need the cane anymore, but he’s on restricted movement for another couple months which is driving him - and in turn, me - nuts.”

She laughed, bringing a hand to her mouth. “Oh no.”

“Yeah,” he said, giving her a wry smile, “I gotta get my own place.”

Someone banged into her from behind, Rey about to throw hands before she realized it was Rose. 

“Rey, Rey! Karaoke’s about to start. I signed us up for Livin’ on a Prayer.” Poe laughed, drawing Rose’s attention. “Don’t you laugh, Dameron. That means you too.”

He gave Rose the best impression of Kes’s classic ‘who, me?’ gesture, Rey bursting out laughing.

But he was a good sport, singing along with them while Rose hammed it up on lead, everybody a little tipsy and more happy than she’d seen them in ages.

So when the night started to wind down, it was no surprise to Rey when Rose approached her.

“Hey, I don’t think I’m gonna be able to take you home.” She shot a glance over her shoulder to where Finn was waiting by the door. “I think it’s finally happening, Rey!”

Rey raised her hand at Finn, who grinned sheepishly before returning the gesture. “Oh, yeah it’s definitely happening,” she said to Rose. “You guys are Ubering, right?”

“Of course.” She pulled Rey into a quick hug. “I’ll call you tomorrow. Be safe.” With a parting wink she was gone, Finn holding the door open for her.

“Wait, did they just leave?” Poe showed up at her side, having gone to the bathroom a minute ago. “Rude.”

“Together. They left together.” She watched as the comprehension dawned on his face. “I assume you had something to with that.”

Poe shrugged, unable to keep a smile off his face. “I may have told Finn to go for it.”

“Well, thank god. I cannot handle another Friendsgiving with those two awkwardly pretending not to flirt.” Tilting her head back, she drained the final sip of beer from the bottle. “I think that’s it for me. You have a ride?”

“I was just gonna Uber.”

It might have been the booze or maybe it was the nostalgia high, but Rey was feeling braver than she had since she took a chance on a farm boy with a heart of gold. Taking a deep breath, she made up her mind.

“Isn’t the farm 40 minutes away? I live like 10 minutes from here, you’re welcome to crash.”

Rey recognized the smile that spread across Poe’s face, the way it shot heat straight to her core. 

He didn’t even hesitate. “I mean, it’s really late, I wouldn’t want to wake Kes when I got home.”

“Yeah, that would be terrible. He’s still recovering.”

“Exactly.”

Then she was putting her address into his phone, and they were getting into an Uber, silence stretching as the tiny Nissan pulled away.

Rey couldn’t stand it any longer. “You know I’m sorry, right? About how everything ended.” Poe started to say something, but she raised her hand to stop him. “I was 17 and I thought I knew better than everyone, but if you and your dad hadn’t stepped in, there was no way I would have made it to graduation. Or hell, college. I was drowning and I was too young and stupid to realize it. So, thank you. And I’m so sorry.”

At some point during the course of her speech, Poe had taken her hands and now she was holding on for dear life. 

“I know,” he said, his smile sad. “And I’m sorry, too. I should have tried talking to you again, but I was so damn scared. So I went behind your back and broke your trust.” He paused, steeling himself for whatever else he wanted to say. “Also, I lied earlier. I did come to your grandfather’s funeral. Dad came and picked me up from school, and when we got there Finn stopped us at the door. Told me it would do more harm than good. So I waited in the car while Dad paid his respects.”

Rey’s heart gave a lurch. Of course, she remembered seeing Kes, but the thought of Poe sitting in the car because he didn’t want to hurt her further… it broke her damn heart.

“He was right, you know. I would have turned you away or worse. I wasn’t ready to admit to myself yet that you had been right.” She gave a sharp laugh. “Aren’t we the pair?”

The song changed, Rey instantly recognizing the opening chords. She looked over at Poe, whose eyes widened in disbelief. They both burst out laughing.

“This song is haunting us today.”

It was the same damn Sufjan Stevens song. Their song. 

“I swear, I did not plan this.” Poe put a hand over his heart. “We can probably asked him to change the station.” He leaned forward to do just that, but Rey put a hand up to stop him.

“I think it’s a sign.”

He cocked his head at her, “A sign for what?

“For this.” She didn’t think, simply leaned forward to close the distance between them.

Poe met her halfway.

After all this time, kissing Poe Dameron still felt like coming home in a way it never had with the other men in her life. Not that there had been all that many. A respectable amount, though none had quite measured up to what she now realized was the Poe Dameron paradigm. And here, she’d just thought her standards were high.  And she supposed they were, thanks to the man in front of her. She knew what is was like to be worshipped thoroughly, and no one else had even come close. 

Speaking of, Poe buried his hand in her loose hair, drawing her forward until the seatbelt strained against her chest. His tongue begged entry at the seam of her lips, Rey opening to him without a second thought. She was practically in his lap, but still she tried to get closer, suddenly insatiable after that first taste.

It felt like no time at all had passed when they pulled up outside her little townhouse, the two of them separating long enough to exit the car. Poe tipped the driver extra for putting up with them.

He stood behind her while she fished out her keys, pressing sucking little kisses into her neck, arms twining around her waist. It was so distracting she forgot all about opening the door for a second, instead simply enjoying the feel of him around her. Two failed attempts later, they were through the door, Rey turning to kiss him properly in the dark entry hall. 

They made their way slowly through the house and up the stairs, pausing every few steps to shed another layer. Their coats lay abandoned in the entry hall, Poe’s sweater finding its way to the ground in the main hall. Her sweatshirt joined his undershirt at the base of the stairs, bra following not long after. She didn’t bother with lights. It was pretty obvious where they were headed and she knew the way by heart.

By the time they made it to her bedroom, Rey was fumbling with his belt, her own pants left behind somewhere at the top of the stairs. With a little help from Poe, she got him out of his pants, the two of them falling into her unmade bed.

She giggled when he found that spot on her neck, the one he’d discovered and claimed as his own so many years ago. He dragged his lips back up to hers, the stubble on his cheek scraping deliciously against the sensitive skin of her jaw. 

Rey’s hands roamed across the hard planes of his stomach, the muscle there declaring him no stranger to the gym. She paused at the chain dangling from his neck.

There, sparkling in the half-light of her bedroom, hung Shara Bey’s wedding ring. Poe paused to let her run a finger down the chain, to feel the weight of the ring on her palm.

“You still have it,” she practically breathed in wonder. 

Poe covered her hand and the ring with his own. “Of course. Haven’t found the right partner yet.” He paused, as if hesitating to say what was on his mind. After a second, resolve appeared on his face. “You know, I’m pretty sure she thought it would be you. I think we both did back then,” he finished, his voice barely above a whisper.

It hurt to even think about what they could have had if he hadn't told and she hadn't been so stubborn - the years together, maybe even that ring on her finger.  Rey blinked, a single tear sliding down her cheek. “This isn’t going to be straightforward, is it?”

“Nope.” Poe shook his head, a rueful smile on his face. “Then again, when was it ever with us?”

She laughed in spite of herself, finally bring a hand up to swipe at her cheek. 

Poe tucked a loose strand behind her ear, the gesture so familiar it made her chest ache. “Is that a problem for you? How complicated this will be?”

Rey took a moment to look at him, really look at him, for the first time since they left the bar. 

He was everything she remembered him to be and so much more. Those dark curls were a disaster thanks to her wandering hands, now peppered here and there with the shots of grey she noticed earlier. His eyes had softened over the years, the tiny creases around the edges telling the tale of a life spent smiling. Hope shone bright from those warm brown eyes, never leaving her face as she made her decision.

“Not at all,” she finally answered, tilting her head up to seal it with a kiss.

He laid her back against the pillows, his body slotting over hers in an achingly familiar way. Then she was lost in the solid warmth of his body, his lips tracing down her neck and to her collarbones. 

He paused to run a finger over the dusting of freckles on her chest, always fascinated by the constellations they made across her fair skin. “I always loved these,” he sighed into her skin, tongue picking up where his finger left off.

“I know,” she managed to get out before he took one nipple in his mouth, bringing it to a peak with teeth and tongue. 

Scraping his teeth against the sensitive flesh, he sent a shot of heat straight to her core. Searching for any hint of friction, she squirmed beneath the heavy press of his body, hands seeking out any purchase she could find. She buried them in those silky curls, needing to hold on to something, anything, as he worked his way across the dip in her chest and over to the other breast.  He repeated the process, taking his time to figure out what made her gasp and moan. She was almost relieved when he went lower, dropping kisses in an unmistakable trail leading to where she needed him most. 

Finally he made it, his fingers playing with the edge of her panties. Dark eyes looked up at her in the gloom. “May I?”

“I’d be mad if you didn’t.”

He laughed into the skin just below her navel, the sensation definitely not unpleasant. Slowly, so slowly, he peeled that final scrap of fabric from her body until she was completely bare to him. The look on his face as he took her in was one she would remember for a while, eyes wide and pupils blown.

Opening her legs, he kissed first the inside of one thigh and then the other, Rey practically quivering in anticipation when he finally put his mouth on her.

He started out slow, his tongue making tentative swipes, reacquainting himself with her body after the years apart. It didn’t take long before she was wriggling under his careful ministrations, breaths coming fast. That talented mouth had learned a trick or two in the last 12 years, that was for sure.

The muscles in her thighs were already starting to tense in anticipation when he focused all his attention on her clit, alternating lips and tongue until she was crying out, her back arching off the bed.

Poe worked her through it, not stopping until her legs went still and she sunk back into the mattress, completely boneless. She was still panting when he joined her at the top of the mattress. 

“That was,” she started, losing her train of thought halfway through with a sharp laugh. “Shit, that was good.”

Poe smiled, pulling Rey into a searing kiss, his tongue tangy with the taste of her. She realized with a start that he was still wearing his boxer briefs, cock straining against the black fabric. That just wouldn’t do.

She pushed him onto his back, Poe lifting his ass enthusiastically as she removed the underwear in a smooth motion.

Sitting back on her heels, she took him in. It wasn’t the first time she’d seen him naked, not by a long shot, but a lot had changed in 12 years. 

The basic topography was the same, same gorgeous tan skin, same smattering of chest hair, same old scar next to his right hip from when he had his appendix out at 15, but it was spread across a body she barely recognized.

Muscles bunched beneath that pretty skin, arms and thighs and stomach all benefiting from his time at the gym. In fact, he was just bigger overall, more solidly built. While she never would have called him lanky in high school - he was so broad, so handsome - that was exactly what he had been. It was blatantly obvious that the Poe she’d known had been a boy, and well, this - this was a man.  A man who was very much ready, if the way his swollen cock rested across his stomach was any indication.

Poe, who had been who had been silently watching as she took him in, moaned as she took him in hand, bringing her mouth down to return the favor. 

Now here, he hadn’t changed at all. 

Poe’s hand went to her hair as she started to move, lips gliding up and down while her hand handled what her mouth couldn’t. She brought her tongue into it, swirling around shaft and head, Poe’s grip on her hair tightening with each pass. He seemed to realize what he was doing, letting her go to simply pet her head as his pants and sighs grew louder, more frequent. He left her mouth with a satisfying pop.

“That’s fine, you know, with the hair,” she said, running a loose fist over his cock. No sense in losing momentum. “I don’t mind.”

His eyebrows shot into his hairline. “Really?”

“Really.” She went back to work, noting with some satisfaction a second later when his hand returned to her hair, tugging when she did something he especially liked.

When his thighs started to shudder, she knew there was a decision to make.

This time, she didn’t touch him as she looked up. “So, do you want me to finish or…”

“Or?” He looked very interested indeed in those two little letters.

Suddenly, Rey felt shy, like she hadn’t just taken him deep enough to gag. “Or we could have sex.” It came out as nearly as one word, her face heating.

One of his hands came up to trace the length of her arm, the connection making her less nervous. He’d always known how to calm her, and it was a little amazing how much he remembered. 

“Only if you want to,” he said softly, those eyes containing half a lifetime of unsaid words.

She took a deep breath. “I do.”

“And I always do,” he said, taking her hand in his. “Want you, that is.”

A smile spread across her face, all earlier nerves melting away. “So, we’re doing this?”

“Yeah, we’re doing this.” He wasted no time tugging her down to his lips, the kiss going from 0-60 in two seconds flat.

Things were moving quickly, so quickly she had to force herself to pull away long enough to ask, “Condom?”

His face fell.

“I thought you were a boy scout, Dameron?” She disentangled herself from his limbs, reaching into the bedside table for the box she kept there. Not that they got used all that often, but she didn't leave this things to chance. She ripped a condom off the strip, checking the date just to be sure before dropping the foil packet on his chest. “Always be prepared.”

“Shit, I mean, in my defense, never in a million years did I think-”

“Less talking, more condom, flyboy.”

He grinned at her sudden boldness, grabbing the condom and flipping her to her back in one fell swoop. His body pinned her to the bed, that smirk never leaving his face as he said, “Oh, we’re using nicknames now are we, Sunshine?”

The old nickname loosened that final knot in her chest, every last doubt vanishing with it. There was something so right about them, she’d always known it, but never more than in that moment as Poe smiled down at her, the ring glinting in the low light of her bedroom. Overcome by the realization, she lost herself in Poe once more, tilting her head up reclaim his lips with her own.

In no time at all, Poe was rolling the condom on to his length, taking a moment to pet the space between her legs. “God, Sunshine, you’re so ready for me.” He was teasing her, making her wait for it.

“Poe.” It was a name and a plea and all she needed to say for him to line up at her entrance and start the slow push inside. 

Her head fell back as he filled her inch by inch, Rey savoring the stretch of her body around him. Once he was fully seated inside her, he gave her a moment to adjust to the fullness, kissing her neck, her chest, her mouth while he waited for the all clear.

“Okay, move.”

Poe didn’t need to be told twice, kissing the tip of her nose before pulling almost all the way out and pressing back inside. His pace unrushed, he took his time with her, pausing to kiss her neck or take a nipple in his mouth as he moved. It was a nice change from how they used to do this, always rushing to finish before Poe’s parents got home or someone’s curfew was broken. Now, there was no hurry; the touches could linger.

Rey took advantage of all that time, her hands skating over the smooth skin of his back, muscles rippling under her palms with every thrust. Those roving hands found their way to the back of his neck, running through those silky curls before pulling him down for a kiss.

Sweat gathered at his brow as he pulled back again, this time, Rey tilting her hips to meet him when he slid back in. It changed the angle, a moan escaping her lips. 

“Atta girl.” Poe smiled down at her, brushing a sweaty tendril off her forehead. “You like that? Lemme hear you again.”

He moved again, keeping the angle just right, earning another soft moan from her lips. “That’s it.”

And just like that, they found their rhythm, Poe keeping the pace and angle just how she liked it while Rey’s hips rose up to meet him on every thrust. Sweet, sweet tension started to build in her core, just on the edge of something great. Poe seemed to sense that, picking up the pace, becoming more intentional in his movements. His hand dropped between them, talented fingers finding her clit after a second of fumbling. 

Rey took a sharp breath, letting those fingers take her higher, the muscles in her stomach pulling taught. This was always the best part, that final acceleration to the finish, when that feeling building deep in her core came crashing down in an explosion of fireworks and starlight. She could swear it started in her fingers and toes, traveling along limbs until her entire body felt electric, waiting for that moment of pure release.

That release came for her a second later, Poe’s mouth swallowing the cry of his own name. Her body was still fluttering around him in aftershocks when he followed a minute or two later, stilling as he spilled into the condom.

He collapsed next to her in a heap of skin and sweat, the two of them trading sweet, lazy kisses while their hearts slowed.

Rey spoke first. “That was…” she trailed off, trying to find the best word.

“A lot better than when we were 17?”

She laughed, feeling lighter than she had in years. “I was going to say ‘amazing,’ but that works, too.”

It hit her then that while she had spent the last decade or so measuring her lovers against Poe and finding them lacking, she’d only been working with the  _ teenage _ version of Poe. Now that she’d had a chance to try the adult model, she knew that, for better or worse, Poe Dameron was without compare.

That thought made her laugh out loud again.

“What?” asked Poe, turning to look at her with a wary expression.

“Just realizing how much better you are at that now.” Poe laughed, swatting at her for good measure. “Hey! It was a compliment. And you said it first.”

“Gee, thanks. You weren’t so bad yourself.” Despite the gentle teasing, he pulled her into his arms, Rey bringing her head to rest softly on his chest. “It’s amazing how much creative you can be when you don’t have to worry about your parents walking in on you.”

“Oh my god, do you remember that time they caught us on the couch?”

“Nope, no way.” Poe shook his head, face going stern. “They did not see anything. We finished before they walked in.”

“Believe what you need to believe, but I’m 90% sure your mom got an eye full.”

Poe groaned, bringing one hand up to cover his eyes. “Can we please not about how my mother may or may not have seen my bare ass right now? It’s ruining my afterglow.”

Rey laughed into his bare skin, which had probably been the point. Angling her head up, she found him already looking down at her, a soft smile on his face. That feeling of rightness overwhelmed her again, that she was exactly where she needed to be. It made her bold.

“I’ve missed you,” she said, her voice quiet.

One second passed and then another, Rey figuring he either hadn’t heard or was ignoring her, until he said equally quietly, “I’ve missed you, too.” He paused as if to decide to go on or not, going with the former. “For months after everything happened, I’d see something that reminded me of you, and I’d be halfway through dialing your number before I remembered. It was like losing you all over again. Every. Single. Time.”  Rey shivered slightly, whether from the cooldown or those haunting words was anybody’s guess. Poe being Poe, stopped for a second to bring the blankets up around them before soldiering on.  “And yet, even with all that, I always thought we’d get back together. How could we not? We were perfect for each other. It took Finn stopping me outside your grandfather’s funeral for me to finally take the hint.” He sighed, the regretful smile on his face threatening to break her heart. “And here we are, twelve years later and I’m still hoping.”

Rey’s breath caught in her chest. 

Hope. It had always been a four-letter word for her. Every single time she had dared to hope in her life it had backfired. Case in point, the man holding her currently.

But was that still the case? Or had she just been kidding herself all along. 

Rey thought back to those early days, right after everything went to hell. Sure, she’d been mad at him, possibly more mad than she ever had been or ever would be. But what she never wanted to admit was how much she missed him in spite of it all. How much she still missed him.

“I think I still hope for you, too.”

The words were barely out of her mouth when Poe covered it with his own, years of longing coming through that single kiss. When they broke apart, his smile was so bright it practically blinded her. 

“Now what?” she asked, her answering grin wide enough to make her cheeks ache.

“Well, we can start with breakfast, see how that goes.” He buried his face in her neck, placing a couple sucking little kisses on the soft skin. The scrape of his scruff sent shivers down her spine. “And I heard there was a Friendsgiving coming up that I certainly wouldn’t mind an invite to.”

“Ah, I see your ploy now,” she half gasped out, Poe having rediscovered that particular spot on her neck. “Sleeping with this year’s host to score a coveted invite.” 

Poe laughed, his breath hot against her skin. “You caught me.”

“Not gonna lie, breakfast sounds like heaven itself right now,” she said, stifling a yawn. “But I gotta get some sleep first.”

“Sleep first, then breakfast?” He settled his head on the pillow next to hers, wrapping her in his arms.

She nodded, eyes already falling closed. “Sleep first, then breakfast.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Just the epilogue left!


	9. Epilogue - Three Years Later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Three years after their reconciliation, Poe and Rey return to the scene of the crime.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who so patiently waited for me to figure out this epilogue. I hope you enjoy the conclusion!

“Are you sure you’re ready for this? It looks like rain.”

Rey turned to where Poe sat in the driver’s seat, nervously glancing out at the sky. She hid her smirk. He was such a worry wart these days. “We’ll be fine. The forecast said it would be dry all night.”

“And the temp? What if it drops?”

“Poe, it’s 70 degrees in October. I don’t think it gets much warmer than this.” She leaned back, watching his face carefully. “Are you sure  _ you’re _ ready for this? You seem a little nervous.”

He sighed, glancing into the back seat. “I know, I know, I’m being silly. Come on, let’s go. I’m sure Finn and Rose are already waiting for us.”

It was the annual alumni football game at Sacred Heart of the Jedi and Poe and Rey were making their triumphant return to the event after having to skip last year for their honeymoon. Europe had been amazing, but none of the sights they saw quite compared to the little souvenir they brought home, currently being strapped into the carrier on her father’s chest. 

Shara Bey Dameron had stolen their hearts from the first moment they laid eyes on her on a fuzzy little screen in the doctor’s office. It had been barely three months since she’d been born, but Rey had never been happier. Or more tired. 

In the logical part of her brain, she knew the smarter option would have been to skip the game, catch up on sleep, but where better to debut their baby girl than at the place where it all started? Twice. 

So they found themselves entering the stadium just before kick off, Rey stopping to adjust the tiny pink ear muffs on Shara’s head. It was loud, but the baby dozed, unperturbed, her head falling forward against Poe’s chest. 

They made their way over to the sign-in table, having officially registered this year.  A pretty blonde woman about ten years their senior was working the table, her bubbly personality marking her as a former cheerleader.

“Hi! Welcome back! Names, please?”

“I think we’re under Rey Dameron.”

The woman shuffled through her list of names. “Ah hah! There you are, the Dameron family. Let me just grab your nametags.” She dug through a small file box on the table. “Here we go, Rey, class of ‘09, Poe, class of ‘07, and this must be Shara, future Knight.” Poe accepted the nametag for Shara, happily slapping in on the carrier. “Oh, I just love seeing fellow high school sweethearts. My husband and I were both class of ‘98.”

Poe and Rey exchanged a look, trying not to laugh in the nice woman’s face. There was no way she could know their complicated story, hell, Rey could barely keep up with all the twists and turns that had gotten them here.

Those first few weeks after their… reunion were tentative at best and downright awkward at worst. One night could not fix 12 years of estrangement, or so they realized pretty quickly. Though neither of them could deny that there was still a bit of that spark, something there that was worth exploring.

So they explored it.

There were dinner dates and coffee breaks, Poe even flying her to New York once as his personal guest, the whirlwind date ending with them holed up in a hotel room overlooking Times Square.

Rey still remembered the day they surprised Kes, Poe not telling him who he was bringing home until she was standing in the foyer. 

There were tears all around as Kes set off Rey who set off Poe, Kes practically tossing his cane across the room to pull her into a hug. It was a shock to find that she was a little taller than Poe's old man now.

The rest, as they say, was history. So when Poe got down on one knee a little over a year later, Rey had never been more sure of something in her life. She said yes, both of them crying as Poe slid Shara’s ring home. Of course it was a perfect fit.  And so it remained on the third finger of her left hand, nestled under the pretty diamond Kes had bought for Shara some thirty odd years ago. 

So she simply smiled at the woman and thanked her, neither needing nor wanting to correct the assumption. 

They headed deeper into the stadium to try to find Finn and Rose, the latter damn near impossible to miss with her nine and a half months pregnant belly.

Rey reached over to hug her bulbous best friend. “Still no baby? I was waiting for the call to cancel.”

Rose groaned. Loudly. “No. And now I’m three days overdue, and I swear to god if all this walking doesn’t do the trick, I’m going to march in there and drag her out myself.”

“Uh, I really don’t think that’s how it works,” laughed Poe, earning a glare from Rose. Finn subtly shook his head in warning out of Rose’s sight line.

“Whatever,” Rose snapped, her anger melting as she redirected her attention to the baby carrier. “Oh my god, those little ear muffs.” 

“I know, right?” Rey smiled. Babies were always good for a little distraction. “You wanna hold her?”

“Like you even need to ask.”

Rose accepted the baby with greedy hands, Shara giving a short squawk at being woken before settling right back to sleep in Rose’s arms.

Rey watched Rose coo at the little girl, rocking slightly to keep her asleep. She wrapped an arm around Rose’s narrow shoulders. “Any minute now.”

“From your mouth to God’s ears,” Rose shot back, though her smile was damn near serene as she looked into Shara’s sleeping face. “Ok, I much as I would love to stay like this all night, I’m not sure my legs can hold up me and the baby and Shara for much longer.”

It took a little shuffling, but soon enough Shara was dozing in the carrier and they were heading toward the stands. As usual, it was a slow go, the crew not being able to move five feet without getting stopped by a former classmate. Though this year, Shara was the undeniable star of the show, with Rose’s belly a close second, the two drawing more attention than ever.

“Oh my god, she’s so adorable. She looks so much like you!”

“You two were always so cute together, I just knew you’d make the prettiest babies. Didn’t I used to say that to you, babe? ‘They would make some pretty babies.’”

“I can’t believe you two are still together! And now with this precious one.”

“Oh she’s darling. You two did well.”

To be honest, it was a little overwhelming, but Poe was happy to show her off, always the proud papa. “I can’t take any of the credit. It was all Rey. And look at her, the spitting image of her mama.”

Even Rey had to admit the resemblance was uncanny. Same nose, same eyes, same chubby cheeks (at least from that age). And though she was currently bald as a cue ball, Rey knew they both secretly hoped she’d end up with her namesake’s riotous black curls, but only time would tell.

Rose, who was getting grumpier with each person who touched her stomach, leaned over to Rey. “Please explain to me how I never realized you two were together?”

Rey wrapped an arm around Rose’s shoulders. “Yeah, looking back it was probably the worst kept secret in school. It was quite a feat.”

Rose laughed, giving her a gentle shove for good measure. 

Finally, they made it over to the fence as the second quarter ended. 

In the carrier, Shara started to fuss as the first band took the field. Rey checked her watch. They had timed this perfectly between feedings, or so she thought. But the first half had gone a little long and now they were headed into dangerous territory. 

She shot a look over to Poe. “Think she’ll make it?” They’d only been planning to stay through halftime, but even that was becoming a tough sell.

“Yeah, just let me…” he trailed off, lifting Shara out of the carrier and into his arms. 

Though Poe was a certified baby whisperer, Shara continued to fuss, her low wails gaining momentum as the band played on.

Rey let him bounce her for a moment, not wanting to interrupt. But when the wails turned to screams, she held out her hands. Poe didn’t hesitate to pass the baby over.

Shara quieted almost immediately, Rey holding the little one against her chest, their cheeks touching as they swayed to the music. Poe may have been a baby whisperer, but they better than anyone knew that sometimes you just needed your mother.

With Shara already snoozing on her shoulder, she turned toward Poe, the look on his face so adoring she couldn’t help but flush. 

“What?” she asked, secretly pleased.

Poe leaned over and pressed a soft kiss to her lips, taking care not to disturb the baby. “Just trying to figure out how I got so lucky.”

Rey smiled, ignoring the fake sounds of retching coming from both Finn and Rose.

“Hey guys, a bunch of us are heading to Fox and Hound for postgame drinks. You in?”

The four of them turned as one, Rey stifling a giggle as Iolo Arana took in first, Rose’s nine months pregnant belly and second, the tiny human in Rey’s arms. 

“Umm…” he said, his eyes like twin saucers.

It was Rose once again who answered. “I think we’re gonna take a pass this year.”

They burst out laughing as soon as Iolo was out of earshot, shuffling like he couldn’t get away from them fast enough.

“I take it Iolo didn’t know you two were together?” asked Rey as soon as she caught her breath. Thankfully, Shara slept on.

Rose rolled her eyes. “He saw us last year, I’m not sure why he’s so surprised.”

Finn tossed an arm around her shoulders, bringing Rose close. “That’s because he knows what he’s missing.” 

Rey turned back as the final band left the field. Apparently, they’d missed the homecoming court completely. A whistle blew, the football players taking the field once more.

“You ready?” asked Poe, running a hand over Shara’s bald head.

She thought she’d feel a pang of regret at the thought of missing out on the after party, but as she smoothed a hand up and down her daughter’s back, she realized she was exactly where she wanted to be. And she wouldn't want it any other way.

Letting Poe drape an arm around her shoulders, she smiled. "Let's go home, flyboy."


End file.
